so blatant on Eggheads and extremely cringey.

its been back recently...with Sandi Torksvik as host.

channel 5 had something really basic...just a voice asking a contestant questions. It was very simple but watchable. 100%

Not sure if already posted this. Couldn't find the worst advert thread. Anyway, that Amazon advert where that little miserable c*nt snowflake baby has a hissy fit and his shitc*nt libtard Dad gets the dog to change it's appearance to look like a Lion to satisfy him rather than put manners on the little shit. It sums up everything that is wrong is this world and makes me want to smash up the living room. It's a matter of time if they persist with it.

Yes, it's worse than all the insurance and betting ads that really annoy me.

It's not even to satisfy the kid though, is it? The kid loves the toy lion, but cries when the dog comes close. They make the dog look like a lion so the kid will like it.

That makes it even ******* worse.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lQz-AgmTm0w

A reasonable point. Life is a bitter experience and the sooner that his entitled and precious progeny assimilates that it's not all about him the better. My main concern is the casual acceptance of intolerance to diversity. Why does the dog have to be a lion just to entertain the "master". A very unbalanced relationship with coercive behaviour going unchallenged. This kind of liberal elitism will be venerating the Black and White Minstrels next. Let's stand up to canninophobia together.

Michael McIntyre .... as funny as lung cancer :jerkit:

My lovely wife moaning about having to stay in for the guy coming to fix the boiler, poor love.

Does this also sum up everything that's wrong in this world? A man could be driven to such rage over an advert? ;)

Trying to get ANY response out of Universal Credit b'stards.

I have continually asked them what I need to supply regarding my on-going issues. They gave themselves a deadline of 31 August. Nothing. I reminded them on 4th September. Still nothing. I will remind them again today (almost a week past their own deadline), but I won't be holding my breath.

How do I get a response from them? Soon, I will somehow have transgressed some unwritten rule and find myself 'sanctioned'. How are they allowed to play god with peoples' lives?

We have family visiting from the US. They're spending time in London, Edinburgh and Paris over 2 weeks. So far, a week in, they've spend most of their days lazing around the house, not getting off their arse until after lunchtime and then seemingly spending most of the afternoon barely sight-seeing in between snack stops.

If you want a holiday where you veg out and just eat shite, don't do a city break holiday, you daft ****ers.

Also, my wife's cousin must weigh close to 400lbs, no exaggeration. And moans that she feels like people are staring at her.

They can't ******* miss you, you annoying ******.

Oh, and said 400lb-er is 28/29 years old, highly likely to be a virgin... and is giving us parenting tips and stories about what child-birth is like.

I'd tell her to get in the bin, but she wouldn't fit.

Yes. They're annoying.

Can this be moved to the 'guilty fancies' thread

Roll her in flour and find the wet spot.

Lorraine kelly so sickly sweet and perfect along with the other tabloid columnists trying to keep women away from the topics that really matter a la harry Enfield sketch - the most nauseating - Alison Pearson of the telegraph along with the vile Sarah Vine of course to be found in the equally hideous Mail.

Sounds like she'd have eaten it before he had chance

Even you wouldn't...

I'd post a picture but it's no surprise her FB page doesn't really contain any "full length" photos. Probably didn't have a wide enough angled lens.

Hmmm. Goes on about her a bit, doesn't he?
Makes you think...

I've seen a film that starts off like that......

Credit card fees when booking tickets or holidays. The card companies are capt at 0.3% why charge me 1.5% you profiteering ****ers?

She's currently camped out in my house FFS :veryangry

Have you had to buy two seats for her on Sunday?

Well that's not true - we pay 1.6% for credit card transactions. Debit cards are minimal.

AMEX is about 2%.

**** that - it's my escape. I'm coming alone and leaving Elizabeth to look after her! :D

Get her to fart to give you a clue

Clingfilm.

Not having any is far more annoying.

Whats 400lbs in the real world?

About 28 stone ish

Wooden bastard kitchen worktops. Spent a large chunk of Saturday sanding and oiling the bastards and they've already got mysterious black marks on them again.

Seriously what's the point of having kitchen worktops that you breathe on without bloody marking them? Next place I move to I'm getting those horrible plastic student house type ****ers that last forever.

Wow, play this on repeat loudly :angel:

Oh baby, I'm there......

Hope she doesn't borrow your computer / tablet and sees this :eek:

:D

Hmmmm think you may be being ripped off by your bank it came out in 2015

https://www.gov.uk/government/news/r...-by-government

I hope you told them that sometimes these Sunday games can go on for hours ;)

Camped - as in her clothing?

Her sausage like digits can't operate the keyboard. She'd be pounding away on it with the same frustration as pounding away on Saxon's cock for the last week. No wonder she doesn't want to leave the house - she's knackered following a week of frantic humping.

For the return flight maybe...

"Hey cousin Liz, what does hubby-Saxo do for a past-time?"
"Well he goes on this internet thingy with his friends talking football. He's quite funny. He doesn't know, but I have his log in details because at one time I thought he was flirting on there with a girl call Maz."
"waddya say we check it out cuz?"
"good idea. You'll love his insightful posts. He's at Burnley so he won't know."
" Oh my gahdd!! 'Things that annoy you.' This should be a totally awesome read.";)

Wow, someone is actually fatter than my ultra spoiled brat brother in law.

:). Yes, a long prayer service before the game kicks off and judging by the way we're playing at the moment we're going to need an even longer prayer service after it!

Can I just say if you're reading this cousin Liz...I think you're just big boned.

About £1m street value if properly split.

I'll split her...the fertile minx.

I've just vomited.

She's not a prostitute, and you no longer drive a truck.

Although if you had a truck she might in the trailer just.

:supergrin::lux:

No, no... "Liz" is my wife and weighs about 8 stone. It's her cousin who is the whale.

Anyway, back on topic...

I'm annoyed by my wife using my BBS login to spy on me.

Is this your wife posting in a cunning double bluff?

I doubt it. She's probably* got better things to do with her life.

*definitely.

Best not to believe anything Saxon says from now on.

That is his wife. Sort of thing a women would say:D

:D

So she'll do it for free!? This gets better and better.

Neighbours who have wind chimes. Selfish f1ckers.

Having only one barrier as the exit barrier at Sanderstead station when around 300 people all get off the train from London in rush hour.

:lux::lux:

Get the wooden ones. Then it just sounds like a Brighton or Leicester home game :D

good luck with that…

I'll swap you, I live next door to Blackpool illuminations.

Saxon not sharing his cousin around, and keeping all the fun for himself.

Nish kumar and ed gamble. Mock the week used to be funny before these two started becoming regulars.

I'm going for my annual Indian tomorrow - I'll take a look on the menu to see if they have this.

Why only annual?

I have an indian (sometimes home cooked granted) about every two weeks. And we have crappy restaurants here.

Yep - wife humors me once a year for my birthday.

He isn't a sheep shagger, been shagging his brothers wife, for EIGHT years.
THE guy is appalling , but Skye don't give a sh+t, coz he was a good footballer,they keep using him, even if he has the morals of a dog

*ucking ordered Ribs twice from different Chinese Restaurants and they're not Ribs, just diced pork. Half the fun is gone.

Nothing like your missus gnawing on your bone.

Your memory is impeccable.

So-called comedian Nish Kumar.

:D

Last night of the proms

What a load of upper class crap

:D don't you enjoy bobbing up and down?

Ads with needless American accents - yes Sky and MnM's YOU!

Agreed - but don't you miss the Fab FM fake mid-Atlantic drawl, m-darlin'?

Colin Murray on Channel 5 EFL highlights show. I quite enjoy him doing Fighting Talk on the radio. But his inane attempts at humour, talking shite, annoying accent and one of those faces I just want to punch simply make the show unwatchable

CNN reporting the hurricane in Florida... I think "shouty Woman" the BBC football commentator should apply to CNN - she would be perfect for the job!

Cleaning up a million leaves from the back yard, only for the wind to kick up when you finished to bring down another million leaves.

It's not even bloody autumn yet!

The Toyota ads in the breaks on Channel 5 cricket

Chris Sutton

Think he annoys Mark Chapman too!

I only bob up and down watching Babestation :D

Pretty girls who decide to deface their bodies with tattoos.

Use of the word 'embarrassing' in GPD.

If people really do find that Tweets or performances embarrass them, they should probably seek psychiatric help.

Yeah, it's embarrassing.

The two PL records Palace have just broken in the space of 24 hours. Embarra... I mean, annoying.

Could "of"/Would "of"/Should "of"

It's HAVE, learn to speak English properly FFS

Samuel L Jackson in the film Kingsman The Secret Service

Not sure you are correct ;)

Hospital volunteers trying to sell crisps and chocolate from their trolley to the outpatients in the waiting room of the gastro clinic, which contains some of the fattest c*nts I've ever seen. Why waste fortunes on expensive consultants, offering gastric bands? Just pay the receptionist more to tell them to f*ck off and stop eating shit.

Retired people who get up at the crack of dawn( when I'm reluctantly heading for work) just to buy a fecking tabloid.

...or to manage Palace...come on Woy :D

"Hunker down",bloody hate the term:wallbash:

People dithering about buying lottery tickets - and asking about all the different permutations.

People dithering about using luncheon vouchers to buy a pastry and a coffee

Seriously, the minute they walk into the consultants room they should get a large note that simply reads, 'Eat less, eat healthier and exercise...you feckin greedy, lazy, weak willed, spoilt bastards'.

Would give anything for my problems to be something that was in my own hands to rectify.

Use of "Woy".

You're basically a Sun clone taking the piss out of someone with a speech impediment. It's really not funny, or clever.

Well don't use it then. Hypocrite.