A 'ripen in the bowl' lemon at that.

I'm in, me too :D

People who don't take my threads seriously and make it their business to derail them when there appear to be many members that enjoy them.
The wankers.
The derailers, not the enjoyers.

Fvcking cold spots in the microwave after six sodding minutes. Shite

Mashed potatoes? Those bast@rds take an age, meanwhile the rest of the grub gets rubberised.

No leftover chilli. Probably nuked whatever goodness there was left in it. Seriously could have heated it up quicker by just breathing on it. 850W my arse.

Aaron Helsehurst. What has the BBC come to with this shouty idiot being dressed up as a business reporter.

The kitchen at work currently has four(!) open bottles of washing up liquid on the go.

Why is it so hard for people to finish off one bottle before opening another one?

Bloke needs a Greggs Steak bake and no mistake.

I find it hard to resist their sausage rolls. :love:

Grown men who have those little man bags. I've just seen a guy wearing a holster (I shit you not) with a man purse/bag clipped to it. The problem is it'll only hold a phone and a wallet and some tissues after people punch him in the face. What a ****.

Haha too kind :p

Yeah but I have to put a disclaimer on this, depends where you are in the world so I wouldn't be seen dead with a man bag in England but it all made sense when I was living in Spain because I lived in flip flops, shorts and T-shirts = no pockets for wallet, keys and phone, so whilst I admit it's shameful out there you NEED a man.

It's not the fact it's a bag, it's the fact it's a tiny bag that you can't keep anything in that you couldn't put in your pockets.

This guy have a full on holster over both shoulders. Like a gun holster, I was shocked.
I thought it was WCB for a second.

I live in Spain and wear flip flops and shorts and would NEVER wear a mans handbag

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com...8576da3918.jpg
Come on MS we all know you keep you femidom in this.

Are you a trucker with a 80's style bumbag?

Because you're a noob. A JCL.

You carry a man bag?

Proudly.

What does a man keep in a man bag?

Man stuff, obviously.

Back in the good old 70's when going out, I'm pretty sure no one ever carried a wallet... just a pocket full of cash. No phones or even car keys if out on the piss.

Different world now.

Together with blood sugar testing kit, insulin...

Condoms...

And ICD net-link up monitorng pack, INR Testing kit, Glyceral Trinitrate Spray and the obligatory .22 Beretta Semi- Automatic pistol with optional silencer.:D

Standard issue kit when making your way back home from the Moon & Stars in Penge after closing time,...:supergrin:

The 'rapper' that was on at the start of the BBC's Olympic coverage. What a racket. Stop trying to be hip and trendy, auntie, just show the athletics

:). If you're going to be out, be proud.

Things that annoy you
 

Saturday Kitchen. What is the point of a cookery show where they don't explain the recipe and it's edited like a Transformers movie so that the shot changes every two seconds?

I don't care about the chef's business, I want to know how to cook the food.

Trying to work out if someone is wearing a palace leisure top with the little eagle on it, or they are wearing a top made by Lyle and Scott.

My teeth are on edge whenever athletes use the word 'medal' as a verb.

Becoming so commonplace that the presenters have joined in...grrr.

People who call the World Athletics championships the Olympics. :wallbash:

His lipstick, tampons etc

Moisturiser. The skin can get really not soft in Spain unless you're careful.

All those things, and some glitter, obviously, this year.

3/4 length trousers on men. It's over if it ever even began.

Cut down jeans where you can see the inside of the pockets below the cut line.

Calvin Klein type "pants"

All so wrong.

Endless pre season whining

On 606 earlier. Jason Mohammad talking about Bristol City being top of the Championship. Always used to be 3 games plus before a league table was started. Even after 3 games it's a meaningless statistic.

Drug cheats allowed back in sport. If it's performance enhancing you should be out forever.

Justin Gatlin

Copy of Loaded, twenty B and H and a flick-knife.

Sadly, I am speaking from experience (which, oddly enough, includes Glyceral Trinitrate Spray). Having said that, I'm yet to find a silencer for my Beretta... :(

How on earth can you edit a live broadcast ffs!!!

It isn't as good as the James Martin era, granted, but it's still the best cookery program on TV IMHO.

People bumping the palace televised matches thread when there hasn't been any announcements

Was just a heads-up to help get people ready in case they have any prep to do in terms of researching hotels or trains to book for Newcastle :rolleyes:

Wasn't a serious dig :p just when you live a bit further afield and every home game is an away game you have to keep close tabs on these announcements

Seconded. He is a buffoon trying to cultivate "an image". Who on earth thinks he is BBC material ?

Is shagging a sport?

Nicked joke...

"I know how Justin Gatlin feels though. I regularly get booed by women for finishing in under ten seconds."

Getting home and all the neighbours are out the front, GOSSIPING. Give it a fvcking rest

xoxo

Loudness of sound system at cinema. Saw Dunkirk and now needing therapy for PTSD!

Seaweed live on Spanish telly

Players in their suits lifting a Wembley trophy.

Football is officially dead :(

.

Which becomes very funny when their keeper lets a 30 yard pea roller through his legs. :D

Not being able to supress my immature giggle every time someone says the name 'Joey'.

people seeing me and standing in the way and not moving and people coming oppsoite direction on pavement and not moving slighty to give way

Fackin hit the cnuts, why they standing in YOUR way, the fackin tosspots

I prefer morning mass myself.

That one c*nting wasp that always invites itself along when you are eating outside. :grrr:

Jim White.

Jim White at Brighton.

This ^^^^

How many more times will he thank them for the 'exclusive access'? No other fecker wants to be there!

Such an oily wanker

Victoria Derbyshire spending our license fees on a half hour piece about a family that have been split because their two adopted sons were not allowed to join them from USA. Turns out they completed the wrong visa applications :veryangry

Any chance of some research before we commission these "isn't everything unfair" articles. :rolleyes:

Away on some poxy Water Treatment Management Course. First Day drop iPhone into toilet.

In the middle of nowhereville and my only Sat Nav is currently bricked.

****.

Back in work after holiday to find numerous passwords have expired and because I have not 'reset' them within xx days I have to go through lengthy process to reapply for new access. arghhh

'Twatter' and 'Faceache' (or any other moronic butchering of any word, but these two in particular.) It's just ******* stupid. It's almost certainly obvious what someone thinks about either site by the sentence the word is in, you don't need to ******* make yourself look a complete ******* imbecile as you share your thoughts ffs.

Twaggot and Faggotache

Did you mistake it for your cock?

You could have stopped typing after the first two words.:)

That's poor, but maybe the programme did help put across the message that people have to look into these things thoroughly (visas can be a daunting process).

Listening to a money programme on the radio recently I heard someone ring up moaning they couldn't get their money back on plane tickets they'd paid for, but have now discovered one of their group hasn't got the right permissions.

The money expert was good, expressed his sympathy but pointed out that it was their responsibility to get this correct, not the airline. He said that from the airline's point of view, the plane will be flying and your seats are booked...not their fault you won't be using them. He did suggest she check the cancellation policy and any insurance she might have, but probably no joy.

She was quite miffed.

:D

The DVLA

They have managed to make a massive **** up and now want me to send in my passport, a covering letter and wait 3-4 weeks for them to correct it and still they act like condescending pricks.

Utter *****...

My sleeping pattern

Attachment 49219

I feel like a zombie

How's the back now Mushroom?

Not too bad thanks. I think I got off lightly compared to some of the other stories people had... made me feel like a bit of a wimp. I get a bit of discomfort first thing in the morning, and when I sit down for long periods.
I now warm up loads before any sport and swim as much as possible. In the church hall opposite, they do Pilates ... but I'd be the only guy going :(

With regard to the Pilates....and your problem with being the only bloke in a room full of hot Milfs is.....?

Horses.

Why is it, that whenever I look after my mum's dog, I will (quite rightly) pick up every little piece of sh*t it does when we are out for a walk, and yet people riding horses are allowed to completely ignore the fact that thier animals can sh*t anywhere they want to. I'm sick to f**king death of jogging around Farliegh and having to dodge so much of it. Honestly, on some days it's like a steeple chase. Get a f***king stable boy to follow them around with a bin and a shovel.

doesn't horseshit have some redeeming qualities unlike dog poo.. I've never known anyone putting dogshit on their veg

Being a biker in the countryside is lethal due to piles of horse shit on corners.

He's gay.

Ah.

Faggot

last few days annoyances

Three Mobile's 'Up yours existing customers' free streaming service.

Platform buffets that don't just sell ordinary tea and coffee as the only hot drinks.

People who gather right outside train or lift doors and look puzzled when people want to get off or out.

The 'live chat' box that keeps popping out on more and more retail websites.

I've never lost the rear end of my car driving over dogshit! Thinking back, my Grandad never went anywhere without a shovel and a bin bag in his boot. He would happily pull up in the middle of a road to collect horseshit to put on his veg. Strangely enough though, now I think of it, he didn't do that until after he'd picked and cooked them. No wonder Sunday dinner tasted so weird when we ate there.

Claire McDonnell on 5 live trying to make something more out of that idiotic runner that pushed that woman - becomes a wider issue into how we share pavements and how can something that is supposed to make us less stressed make is more stressed - just feck off

The approaching nuclear apocalypse

Nah. I think we'll just survive. 16th.

Had to happen one day. Just hope we get to play Huddersfield first. At least we didn't waste money redeveloping the stadium unnecessarily.

Parents that put videos on YouTube of their kids.

Consent confusion in the near future. Yeah thanks Mum & Dad, I'm semi-famous and exposed and I haven't even started high school.

Great idea... Narrow the existing roads even further by creating joggers lanes at the taxpayers expense....

Joggers - the new cyclists :D

What a waste of the new Fan Zone though

Admin fees
Booking fees
Letting agent fees
Etc.

Seriously, WTAF? How did this become a thing? How did we allow it to become acceptable for companies to charge us money just so that we can spend money with them? It does my head in.

Can rename it the Tan Zone

That stupid little kick towards the camera thing they do on Bargain hunt at the end of the show, that in my opinion, ruins a hugely enjoyable show.

Yep, in most cases they're already getting a cut out of the vendor as well. And if they're not, I'd rather they build it into the advertised price and take their cut before passing it on.

The worst ones are where they charge you £10-15 upwards to edit a field on a database. No, dealing with this sort of thing is the cost of doing business with consumers, either build it into your prices or take the hit.

Agreed, and rip off ticket agencies who charge you an admin fee for printing your own ticket at home on your own printer using your own paper, ink and electricty. They should offer a subsidy for the time and effort I'm saving them from stuffing the tickets in an envelope and paying for a 1st class stamp!!!

That's Miss Faggot, Sir to you.