I thought that:lux:

Dear Biggus Mickus

My good self does not resort to using the word "Bol..ks" in the context it was used, preferring to use the term "Poppycock on stilts".
However I recognise the similarities in style.:lux:

Posters who don’t use paragraphs.

Ooh look, back to "

Liverpool fans (again). Shooting fireworks at the Liver Building is idiotic even for them.

People who don't press the thumb button on the handbrake and just pull, making that kkkkkkk noise

Hahaha! I do that, great sound, and you can tell when it has reached biting point.

:hi:

Alternatively, it’s exactly what one would expect from them....

Three clicks means the tension is set right I believe.

I thought the button was just used when releasing the hand break?

My new vehicle has a boring electronic "Emergency" break (as they are called here). Basically pull a little lever like they use for opening and closing the windows. No clicks to be heard...

I just looked the handbrake thing up... Raging debate on several car sites about how handbrake is supposed to work! Lots of different theories...! I can't find a definite answer. I just hate the ratchet noise

Yep, that is what the button is for, not a fan of the new ones, had a hire car which had an "automatic" hand brake made me feel uneasy!

I had one for years on my Renaults. Changed car, and now forget to engage the manual one.

Or punctuation. :mad:

It's not my style to publicly vent my spleen to a media personality but I'd happily make an exception if I ever encountered this odious cretin.

Then I would ask him why (presumably) he supports England rather than Germany or Brazil?

It couldn't be, could it? Hiding in plain sight, throwing everyone off the scent with constant vitriol.
Both posters are erudite & educated. You might be onto something.

He does'nt gone full native and supports Australia over England.

Northampton's gain.

Also deprived you of the dubious pleasure of that burning smell when you drive 30 miles with the manual handbrake still engaged

The amount of litter and them feckin little gas canisters all over the country parks.Why do people not clear there shit up:jerkit:

As my driving instructor used to say. What's worse than mouse sh*t....ratchet!

Those gas canisters turn up everywhere.

and I didn't get to see the cakes they'd decorated either. :(

Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall.

Who doesn't enjoy turnip and beetroot ice lollies at the village fate?

Thats a terrible fate for the village.

My mate did that once in his rover 3500, by the time he realised the drums were glowing bright red with the heat, we all pissed on them to cool em. :D

:hmph: I did wonder, but couldn't be arsed :supergrin:

:supergrin:

The rule that Mrs CE brought in during lockdown to encourage me to help with the washing/be tidier. Any money found in jeans/shorts that either need washing/are left on the floor belongs to whoever washes or picks up said jeans/shorts.

You Tube ads you can’t skip.

Two You Tube ads you can’t skip.

Watching the game tonight

Thought you'd be a YouTube premium customer.

Didn’t even know it existed till you mentioned it. Googled it - £16 a month. Not bad if you’re travelling about for a few weeks for downloads.

Taking ages cooking intricately flavourless food.

Oooh, loss of sense of taste?
You know what that means!!

It's a Jamie Oliver 15 minute meal?

What’s worse is if you have a playlist set up while you shower or cook etc, you know you’d be able to skip the ads if you could reach the screen, but you have to let them play. The advertising company has won.

I don’t don’t pay any money for this kind of service.

:D

I've just had to shut my window. It's bloody cold!

I've just had to open my window ..its bloody hot! 34c

Rooting for Chelsea

West Ham winning :(

Although that does put pressure on Brighton.

Forget that, VAR says offside :D

losing my keys

It's tough, isn't it. :(

My wife moaning that I bought her a gift.

Complaining we should be saving money - even though it was 10 quid.

West Ham winning

Big Zuu popping up everywhere proclaiming his love for Liverpool. Despite born and bred in London. Had never heard of him until the last few days.

The BBC website (again)... after opening the home page it jumps to a full screen ad as soon as you try to navigate it which you have to 'X' out of to get back to the home screen.

(This might be an American problem)

Gotta very strong Liverpudlian accent. Next season it will be Mancunian or whoever else looks like winning the title. What a knob head

My wife making the executive decision that today is a moody day.

She informed me of this. I have to accept it. She is apparantly allowed one of these a week. Not sure when this came in. Probably the tail end of the change.

This new charter doesn't seem to allow any windows for me to have, shall we say, an off colour day. I can't be irritable, depressed, angry, unfocused on trivia things. I can't let outside issues get under my skin for more than 5 minutes.

It seems an everchanging landscape.

Luckily, she is off to Santiago to help my daughter with the coming grandchild. Separation again my friends, but perhaps a healthy 1 month break.

It is a bit like the X Americans seem to be putting in the Vote Trump box.

The rain and wind over the last few days have ruined the grass seed I've put down.Lawn is going to have a few bald patches. More than annoying after the effort I've put it:mad:

I've put turf down so hoping for rain to water it and to keep my fecking kids off it so it beds in.

Twats who walk down the middle of the pavement, waddling their fat arses after you have politely moved to one side to maximise distancing, and even worse when there are two of them and they insist on walking side by side on a narrow walkway.

https://i.ibb.co/D9HzwbP/Turf-cut-by...of-Ireland.jpg

Tidy job.

Sod of a job.

My back aches just looking at that. Our bog was on top of the hill too so it was a steep climb, cut by hand, fingers slashed to ribbons footing it, and then lugging it back down. But that first lemonade/pint (depending on age) when it's down & saved was glorious & made it worthwhile.

Brighton looking likely to hit 36 points...would've been funny watching them make a hash of the end of the season and nervously looking over their shoulders.
Also sap of stepson using my grouting sponge to was his bike...he's never bothered before to wash one but now he had he's opted to use the brand new one I'd bought and so far used for one third of the kitchen tiling.
Tomorrow I'll be back ranting about my shit walls when the tiling resumes.

Peat cutting is jolly bad for the environment, but I suppose it’s one of the lesser races’ cultural traditions we have to endure just like the Faroese whale-slaughter, the Cruel Heathen Chinee’s love of gambling or the [redacted]’s predilection for noncery.

The Irish government tried to ban turf cutting. They'd rather the population bought power & energy from them, as opposed to farmers working their own land.
(I suppose it might free up more time for the more traditional pursuits of diesel washing & pig smuggling.)

And SAS div butchery.

Goalkeeping and defensive mistakes.

The Budweiser Wassup ad- painful- and does anybody drink that crap?!

True that. Budweiser is horrible

Bud weis UUUURGH! :frown:

Goal frames lifting off the ground when a goal is scored in arguably the richest league in the world. Looks so fecking pikey and something you'd expect down your local sports centre.

the term 'Royal duties' meaning stage managed photos to try to prove you are of some relevance . For real duty see the NHS workers, the posties, bin collectors et al. who do know what a day's work entails.

People that name their cars. Get a grip you ******* losers.

Those brown paper jiffy bags that are full of that tumble dyer fluff that go everywhere when they don't open nicely.

Brand spanking white trainers that the dog stands on after 5 minutes leaving the shoelaces stained.

You are Tony Pulis and I claim my £5.

Isn’t that by design ? To stop the ball pinging back off the back of the net and some dopey ref not to give the goal.

Think Bristol City and young Freddie....

:D Good luck getting £5 out of Pulis.

Ooof...true that.

Beat me to it. Yes, by allowing the back of the net to lift up a little it helps cushion the ball to stop it bouncing out, as you say.

A large branch falling from a neighbours tree in the night, smashing pots and plants.

Odd thing is I didn't hear a thing... what's that philosophical saying about, "If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?"

I guess schmuck here will have to clean it all up...

'Stoked'. F**k off.

Knowing that against my better judgement i will waste 2 hours watching palace on tuesday

Blimey. I won't.

Me neither, Im working.

I'm not working at that time. But I may switch to admin after 15 minutes or so.

The Strand (I blame Roxy Music)

Wasn't a wasted 2 hours after all.

And Arsenal vs Leicester is a good game as well.

Doesn't annoy so much, but will do.

Wife has gone back to Santiago for a month. Helping daughter out with a baby due.

Nice to have some peace for now. But I reckon a week or so and I will be missing her again.

Earlier today, having drained a very sludgy central heating system in a 1st floor flat, I carried my hose back down to the van. On the way back up the stairs, I was horrified to see black drips right the way up the communal carpet and along the landing that must've come out of the hose. I hastily grabbed some washing up liquid and proceeded to remove the stains in the hope of not getting caught. Ten minutes of panicked scrubbing later it dawned on me that the reason the stains were so difficult to get up was that they were bone dry, and had probably been there for months :hmph: At least nobody saw me, I would've looked proper guilty.

Companies that use “hand written” font on letters to disguise the fact they contain adverts. I wonder how many people they fool into opening them?

Unless something has completely changed in recent years, the answer will be most of it. Around 10 years ago I think the accepted figure for direct mail that is opened by the recipient was circa 80-85%. I just did a quick search And the first reference I found said 90% is opened. A stunning 42% of recipients read or scan their direct mail. So circa half of those open it admit to that. Having done some detailed work on this a while back I believe those numbers.

Just goes to show we are all weird. Also that many people lie in public, because you ask that question down the pub and the response you will get from most will be nah, just throw it in the bin, and mine’s a pint of bitter please :)

To be honest I usually open them out of curiosity. Scan the contents, and put them in the shredder.

Ask me 10 minutes later what they were selling and I would not be able to tell you.

I brought it up, as I got one today that the writing appeared to be very "casual" in style... but on a closer look and comparing characters it was obviously computer generated font.

Retirement and Virus restrictions keeping you busy HH?

That and short term memory issues!

Probably too late to eat nuts and fish and do brain puzzles..

Well I eat a lot of nuts...

Not really an annoyance, more of a head-scratcher I guess...

Here at least, there seems to be a preponderance of youngish men who I see walking about wearing hoodie sweatshirts. The oddity is it is in 90°F+ (30°C+).

I have to say it looks mighty suspicious to be, but on the whole these guys look pretty innocent and going about their business.

I'm in shorts and a t-shirt and in an air conditioned car most of the time and still sweating my balls off.

If it was one or two I wouldn't think too much of it, but it's lots... are the younger generation getting cold blooded? Is it a side effect of Covid-19? Are they slaves to fashion?

Very odd.

^^^ Riding my bike this morning the temp on my trip computer was registering 93°F.

I overtook a girl of maybe 15 to 17 riding a beach cruiser bike in shorts, but wearing a bloody great hoodie all zipped up.

I wonder if it has anything to do with years of their mothers sitting at desks with heaters blasting every working day regardless of the weather?

People who avoid you like you are murderer walking past you, but still are not that bothered that they wear a mask.

Probably young spoilt white kids trying to look street. The hoodie is also handy, along with the mask, when they spray BLM for the cup on some old dears garden wall.

Rope and light worked a treat
https://i.postimg.cc/gkGD8YRB/20200711-194700.jpg
Found bind weed coming through today.Been here before but have had geotex down for 6 months and thought I'd sorted it.Reckon it's coming from next door who can't be arsed to do anything in the garden:jerkit:
Hope it bites them in the arse when they try to sell:D

Peoples who only talk about themselves, often using their own names in the process,as soon as you mention something they turn the conversation back to themselves. This often involves hearing the same story repeated for the thousandth time.

Hermes