Pop-up sign on the computer screen repeating frequently lately, telling you to switch to Chromium as your default browser etc etc. In the text it says to click OK to accept(large OK @ bottom right) or 'click above to exit' in very small text. There is no icon to click, you must put the arrow OVER THE 'Click here to exit' in tiny text above which most people wouldn't do or notice, so falling into the trap. Ba###rds! Grr! F-off Chromium! (Eh, eh, calm down, calm down - Ed.)

People wasting my time with their thoughtlessness. It's like having tiny increments of my life stripped from me , bit by tiny bit. Things like:

*People just stopping in exit doorways, so people behind them can't get out
*People not indicating when driving their car. So I have to wait to find out what the fck they are going to do
* Being put 'on hold' on the telephone
*Unsolicited phone calls and people knocking on the door - if I want you, i'll call you.
* Project meetings which overrun because people use it to raise their own personal issues. - Make a separate appointment with the Boss and don't waste my time hearing you whine.

Bloody Poles.

When I moved here there were a couple opposite me. Now the number has quadrupled. I wish they could all be put underground.







The first 2 were for electricity and telephone, but now all the cable providers have their own one. Bloody annoying.

https://www.freesoundeffects.com/free-sounds/gun-10081/

Play one of these loudly behind them :p

Reffering to Rooney as Roo. The only roos I ever see are usually lying by the side of the road dead. Actually the BBC sport site in general.

That stupid 12 days of Cantona song. Imbecilic and pointless, lacking in any sort of wit or thought. AND they're going to sing it in perpetuity when they play us.

Coming back home from a grand crisp autumn morning walk to find that our cat has shat himself all over the place. First time he's ever done it. Still got chucked out though

Being tooted and given the hand gestures for doing the full speed limit in a section with cameras and a reputation for tickets. Could understand it a little if I was crawling but I wasn't.

Also some nutter was doing a least 80mph in a 40 zone on the same trip and nearly cleared up the car in front as it overtook and changed lane at the same time.

What is wrong with these people.

People who refer to a pub by the company that own it's name rather than the pub's name and then not happy with that they add an s to the owners name and then **** me they then decide they're not happy with that so they then shorten it to Spoons.

Don't have nightmares.

Being 90 minutes into a three hour journey next to 4 p!ssed up MC bellends giving it massive.

Buying a 'ripe and ready to eat' avocado for dinner on the way home and finding that it has the consistency of a raw potato. They're generally only edible 50% of the time at best; they should be done under the Trade Descriptions Act.

Palace's defending in 2016

Don't think I have ever been able to buy an actual ready to eat avocado in this country. Great annoyance!

Relatives that you don't particularly like, phoning up and saying they're passing through and are gonna drop in, in about 15mins.
There goes my day of playing Fifa in my pj's

I work with one of those, loves the sound of his own voice and seems to want others to go into great detail about the work that they are doing even though it's nothing to do with him making meetings last 20-30 minutes longer than they should.

I think he thinks he is impressing management.

Last week he was supposed to be on annual leave but came into work on Thursday and Friday because he was bored at home.

My heart sinks when I see him around the office.

Twats feeding pigeons in North End

The BBC in general's and 5Live in particular's sudden obsession about where Andy Murray is in the world rankings this week. If he'd won a grand slam tournament, fair enough, but for the past fortnight it's been incessant bulletins about how "it's match point to set up a quarter-final that puts him one match away from staying at number one" in some obscure tournament that I've never heard of before.

That is one of the most tragic things I have ever read on this thread.

Only just pipped by hatters getting annoyed by spoons

Oi

In the punditry world, no one annoys me more than Garth Crooks.

Going into a restaurant or bar and being greeted by "Y'alright?" instead of "Good evening sir" or similar.

Nando's for you

Spoons ?

You need to introduce him to the BBS he will never be bored again.

People who beat up innocent defenceless bus shelters. Really what do they get out of this??
Black Friday and all the shit that comes with it.

Over-quilted bog rolls which allow no fvcking purchase whatsoever

Bagpipes

Can't we just open it up to all Scottish people and things? :D

Works for me today mate :D

Bagpipes are a particular irritant for some reason. I think I always associate the sound of them with nationalism and anti englishness. Probably wrongly but there it is. Trainee bagpipe players particularly get on my wick, especially when I'm trying to have a lie in. Dunno about you :)

Oh, I love the pipes! I was in Bristol for Remembrance Day, and they had a magnificent pipe band marching down the street. It was really, really moving.

Remembrance day is allowed, thats a bit different. Its the screetch from down the street that is slightly different. Especially in the bloody morning.

I think Elgin has a point about bagpipes. The walk from the centre of Edinburgh to Murrayfield when England when the Calcutta cup is played up there is full of people (mainly kids) making godawful noises on those things and demanding money for it.

It's not just the calcutta cup. It's every bloody day if you are in there with a train all the time. At least in Glasgow they just glass you if you're English.

Bagpipes are the Devil's work. The most hideous sound ever.

Maz, you are going to rot in Hell cursed to all eternity to listen to Mull of Kintyre played by trainee bagpipers.

Badly designed shit that is absolutely useless at its intended purpose... I've been trying to figure out how to fit downlights without the retaining springs either taking chunks out of the new plasterboard ceiling or taking chunks out of my fingers. It can't be done. They're the DIY equivalent of tetrapaks - they don't ******* work. On the plus side my swearing has hit new heights.

Murray may well be Britain's greatest sportsman but he is one scruffy f*cker. With all the money he has you'd think he could afford a decent barber and wear decent clobber on the court instead of an overgrown pube barnet and wearing ill fitting cast off shit from a charity shop.

Smarten yourself up you jock c*nt.

I think the same geezer invented the traditional mousetrap.

Getting the feckers out again is even worse.

Uncanny. That's exactly what Annabel Croft said to him at his post-match interview last night

(Tip incoming)

Get someone in to do it

I fiited 3 at home today, no problems

Patronising NHS adverts that warn me that cold weather can be bad for me because I'm 65. Thanks for that.

Leaks when it's absolutely p****** it down like it is now. Bum - we seem to have sprung 2 leaks that we thought were fixed but it now seems were just playing hard to get. The real problem is that with weather like this you can't get a roofer for love nor money and by the time they do come, it's dry and not a problem and we pay for them to fix a wild guess at what the issue was. Doh!
Elton John wrote about this stuff in The circle of strife.

Bloody hell, you're 65? Get one of these before it's too late:

http://bookofjoe.typepad.com/.a/6a00...a7db970c-800wi

Lol well there we go. You'd think his mummy would be there to brush his hair. Then again she probably dresses him. He looks like a bin man in a hot country.

I'll put it on my Christmas list. I mean I really hate it when my son buys me a litre of Jack every year.

Good idea, firewater will help keep you warm:).

Getting a puncture......and then requiring two new tyres and new brake pads.....

A week after the Mrs needed four new run flat tyres, a new water pump and an oil leak fixed. £1800

Ffs.

Almost certain it's been covered here....but people who refuse to move down the carriage on busy trains stopping others behind boarding! Why oh why oh why!!

Could have bought a new set of clubs, trolley, waterproofs, and played at turnberry for that

But I guess you know that

:p

Giant SUVs and tinted windows, mainly prevelant on the morning and afternoon school runs as far away from anywhere necessitating their real use.

What it means that when you get to a junction wanting to turn left and you have one of these behemoths next to you going right, you cant see anything and are forced to sit and wait for them to cross traffic as you cant see any of the other road users coming down the road and edging out isnt safe as you need to go past 5m worth of engine block onto the road to see anything.

Reigate Hill tomorrow.

£15
:D

Leave two of these by the door. If a burglar breaks in they will see them and shit themselves. One of my favourite Billy Connelly gags.

the thing that gets me about this is you can't make eye contact with the driver, it's amazing how unnerving I find this as I assume we normally do it subconsciously.

Bloody Cockney wankers who ask for directions,one of such tossers accosted me in town,his car plastered with Chelsea stickers,his opening greeting was "Oy mate,how do i get to dublin from here,i ignored him at first,but he persisted,this time slightly more politely,I advised against using the motor way,instead,i drew him a fairly detailed map,"a short cut"as i called it,i included a particular vital left turn,which will have taken him into a 2500 acre pine forest,nowhere near dublin,if he finds his way out,i hope he is more polite to the next person he asks for directions.If he doesnt,he will probably get sent on another wild goose chase.Buy a fecking sat nav,or learn some manners,wanker***** you Chelsea.

Putting your ******* indicators on when your halfway through turning the corner is no ******* use to anyone.
Try putting them on when you're sat waiting at the traffic lights

Martin, just get them to do a flood test to identify the issue.

Things that annoy you
 

I brought a coffee from Local coffee outlet. As the lady made my coffee she handed me my change and receipt. I threw away receipt in communal shop bin, and put £5 in wallet and coins in pocket. I've got outside and realised I've got the receipt in with my notes (in my wallet) which means I've thrown the ££5 in the bin... is it worth bin raiding in a busy coffee shop for my fiver?

This happened because I was on the phone as I did the coffee transaction. It's only a fiver... but I'm so ****in pissed off with myself.

Attachment 47677

^the bin

My fiver is so close, yet so far

I'm gonna go for it

Got it. Wasn't as embarrassing as I imagined. I explained to the lady behind the counter and she took the lid off, bin bag was transparent so I didn't have to go thru too much rubbish

You deserved to lose that fiver for not having the manners to put your phone away when in a shop.

That annoys me.

And 'brought' instead of 'bought'. FFS.

Good work Mushy.

Watch out for snipers later :p

Cheers dude

That Aldi ad where the woman marvels at the lovely conditions their turkeys are kept in.

Then eats one.

Terrible acting and I bet that wasn't all she gobbled.

Dickheads who send you abusive PMs and then run away.

Tooke me a while to get that joke.:confused:

People who are slow at getting simple gags.

Seems fair

I bet he said "can I get" too ;)

People who take eight sugars and three or four teaspoons with their coffee because they can.

Deodorant all badged up to work for 48 or 72 hours. What type of dirty c*nt are they targeting. If you go that long without washing I doubt you f*cking bother in the first place.

Pat read my mind, must be a similar age thing :)

10 year old boys if mine is anything to go by.;)

That won't change 'til he discovers girls.
At which point, Granny's xmas present of Brut will be brought into play :p

:)

'Can I get my fiver out of the bin' would have been alright though surely. Unless he shook her hand afterwards.

The BBC website

Previously a cornerstone of news and sport, its now been reduced to an almost tabloid magazine level of inanity, concentrating its main headlines on Strictly and the Bake Off, which are now of more importance than any actual news. It also considers constant stories of women being 'outraged' at being asked to leave Nandos cause they are breastfeeding of national importance and has further stooped to the level of including Facebook style ' 8 Celebrities who have never flown on a plane' type lists..........

Embarrassing.

The international version is less polluted.but cannot get it here.

Cyclists in the City.

Its all very well getting irritated when commuters don't jump out of your way immediately when you ring your little bell but perhaps you should have a chat with the 50% or so of your ilk who have decided red lights don't apply to them, so we actually know where we stand.

Totally agree. It was so good, and now it's so bad.

This
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-38073866
9 people moan and a health and saftey ban is in place.

It's not much better tbh. Relies too much on short video clips to tell a news item rather than a detailed report. Videos which either "are not available in your country" or videos that make you sit through a 30-45 sec ad to watch a 10-20sec summary.
Used to be probably the best news site on the web, now it's average to poor at best.

And is a clone of the CNN website in format and content.

Sorry - should say App - not sure about the Websites

Let idiots kill themselves - it will increase the intelligence of the gene pool.

At least it saves us from having to watch a completely shit advert over and over. The sort of bollocks Apprentice candidates come up with.

oh I know, but I used to loathe going away for any period of time because I would be stuck with the international version. Now I look forward to the international version.

The BBC would have surficed

The whole organisation is a disgrace

Not at all.

There is a whole world of things to dislike about them, I agree, but they are one of the best at producing documentaries, such as the current Planet Earth II.

Both of these may well have been done before but I've had a bad day so striking while the iron is hot...

1. People who are incapable of walking in a reasonably straight line and inadvertently cut you up on the diagonal when you try to overtake them, then look annoyed at you for encroaching into their space.

2. People who shove stinking fat burgers into their gobs whilst sat next to you on the train - yes you, coach B seat 66 on the 16.33 from Kings Cross to Leeds.

On a plane being asked to swap your aisle seat with someone in a middle seat so they can sit next to colleague, lover whatever. Not once has it ever happened the other way round.

I find a simple "Nah" delivered with a downturned mouth works a treat on these occasions.

Michael McIntyre, unfunny twat.

Getting the glass screen on the wife's phone replaced last week, only for it to crack again today. Bastard.

On one occasion there was a woman looking at her boarding pass, then at the seat next to me, then at me, promptly asked the air hostess if she could find another seat!

You weren't naked again were you??

Only from the waist down.

Thought so, they're really cracking down on that now!
Thing to do is wait till they are locked in next to the window and them give it to em, especially if it's a long flight and they fall asleep. Or so I've heard!

Taking an old working fridge to the dump for my boy, and then replacing it with a better fridge from the garage, getting it up to his flat only for the fecker to bang and stop working.

I'm sure you can collect one the next time you watch Palace. :)