People that moan about the xfactor constantly! Don't like it don't watch it, what don't they get. I am not watching it this year but don't go on about it.

:confused:

You ok pal ? First you answer your own posts and then this

Travelling with people who care whether they are facing forwards or backwards on a train.

Gardening and home fecking improvement programs that have Mrs CT designing some project that muggins has to try to make up improbable "technical" reasons why it can't be done/fecking end up breaking my back over.

That smarmy bastard Lewis Hamilton being mentioned in the same breath as the legendary Ayrton Senna (RIP).

Losing your keys after just finding them.

'Getting a shot away'.

Shooting, you mean, you plastic sodding pundit?

explain to Mrs CT that if she wants something done she can either a) do it herself, or b) pay someone else to do it for her.

**** DIY.

Watching the first half hour of yesterday's game then getting in the car to drive to work only to find 5 live at the rugby, Jason Cundy answering the phones on Talksport and Gaby fvcking Roslin playing Keane on BBC shitting London.

Her father is incomprehensible.

That short whistling ringtone. It doesn't make you cool and it's ******* annoying. Put your phone on silent.

but then you wont hear it ring ....:confused:

People with intelligence but F--k all common sense.

Have to confess I am one of those, makes me feel sick facing the wrong way.

The distribution of intellgence in the population is a bell curve. The very clever and the very stupid are bell ends.

i phone and i pad charging cables that are not bloody long enough.

same, it just feels wrong going the wrong way

In the 70s there was a Trident aircraft that had a few seats facing the back like a train, I once flew 'backwards' it was bloody weird but didn't make me feel sick. I would only feel sick if I was facing Vanessa Feltz or some c*nt wearing a Chelsea shirt.

BA Business class has them too.

yeah, but in ba business the backwards facing ones get you away from the aisle so distinctive upside

People who don't know who Ronnie Pickering is http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...ped-rider.html

Landing at an airport 45 minutes ahead of schedule then being stuck on the Tarmac for an hour and a half because there is no gate available.

People reading books while walking through a busy train station and taking no notice of where they are going.

Foul smelling food on trains.

Cheese other than Cheese cake!

.

Tractors and more specifically convoys of tractors. It's that time of the year and I reckon I'll get stuck behind at six a day.

I think that's part of the territory where you live isn't it ?

People who keep quoting trolls that I have on ignore.
:(

I agree but if it tractors that bugs him then Pheasants must be on his list as well. The most stupid of all birds, who at certain times of the year appear to play chicken with any car that dares to drive along the country roads. If I actually knew how to hang, pluck, gut one ,then stuff it like a chicken, and cook it, around here I would not need to shop for a Sunday roast for about 4 months a year.
I can here the cry now from the city folk , but its a poor bird living in the country, this year son in law has paid out £200 to fix the broken headlight washer caused by one that flew straight at him.
They totally ignore any attempt to pass , sound a horn at one standing in the middle of the road it will look at you continue to wander around the road totally ignoring you, finally going to the side of the road you start to drive and it goes "got you" and jumps back into the middle. My nightmare journey this year was the flock of 8 on the A46.
There high on my list of things that annoy you

There's a roundabout on the A45 just after the m45 finishes where during certain points of the year at 1am you'll do well not to squash about 85 rabbits.

The jubilee line. A good service when there are about a million people waiting for it.

Try the A46 here in Lincolnshire at night between Lincoln and Market Rasen, its a hive of nocturnal delight. Rabbits ,Hedgehogs, Badgers, Foxes ,Deer , then you add various type of scurrying animals including weasels rats and minx all appear as you drive along, none of which appear to have learnt from Tufty the Squirrel, (add them to the list). If your lucky circling above you are the owls, ok, they dont circle but glide along the hedgerow or across the fields. For a while there was a lone eagle (not seen it this year).

They are as thick as charlton aren't they.

One outside our house on Sunday on the road. Kids watched it walk in front of 2 cars - if it had stood still it would have been fine. How it survived God only knows

Hoardes of Asian tourists in London. Don't get me started on the selfie stick....

:D

Love the 2nd one :)

Chip shops that charge you for a sachet of ketchup.

Robbing bastards.

:D:p

get a different ring tone then

WTF is Ch5 showing Christmas films this Saturday. It'll only just be October you muppets.

Pheasants don't annoy me so much, but yep they are irritating when they come hurtling out along the Swaffham Downham road. Especially in front of cars passing opposite each other or worse overtaking. I once saw one get smashed fifteen feet upwards when hit by an unsuspecting old boy overtaking a lorry along that stretch.

Was hit by a partridge on the M25. Took out whole near side headlight cluster, and went through the grille into the radiator. I had to virtually spoon out the remains, and then got hit for a £ 700 bill from BMW

wouldn't mind if I get to put as much S&V as I want on my chips there

Ketchup on chips is for plebs anyway

:D

Had a pint with one of my good mates who's from Hull. Knows this geezer well and knocked him out back in the day coz he was a bell end. PMSL at some of the stories. Great hour in the pub tonight :lux:

Slightly related, someone I knew used to order his fish and chips , and when no one was looking he used to lick the wooden forks that they supplied.

He stopped when he realised he may not be the only one doing this .

:D

Which reminds me:

Wooden forks in chippies. Utterly useless for eating the fish.

The word 'artisan' - seems to be the latest bollocks buzzword for shops.

Such as 'artisan coffee' at Clapham Junction station. Just no.

Had a similar problem, got hit by a car who wiped out my wing mirror.
£120 for the mirror glass, £74 for the wing mirror cover. £50 plus vat to paint it.

Getting quoted £714 for your multicar renewal policy.

If you've got 27 cars that's pretty good value

You need the Middle Class Problems thread EE

:D

Blimey, has it only just reached Newcastle?
It must be like living in 1989 up there.

Schools that send out letters informing you that something requiring parental involvement is scheduled for the next day.
I swear they think we all sit around drinking coffee in artisan cafes while the kids are at school.
Scheduling a parents' 'evening' for 5.00pm.

Along with organic, locally sourced, rustic, sustainable, street food etc. Adding any of these to labels or packaging immediately triples the price of any old shit and has gullible (usually) middle class idiots tripping over their wallets to throw cash at you. Sprinkle organic quinoa on a bit of dog shit and the gormless ***** would probably be fighting eachother over it.

I get mildly irritated by a more common and basic one than that...it's when they promote something that is clearly mass-produced as 'homemade'.

Try asking the staff whose home they made it in, they'll laugh nervously and shrug it off with a comment like 'well, it's not really homemade, we buy it in from a supplier'.

You can tell from the ingredients list that it's been made in a factory and the homemade marketing is at best meaningless, if not a con.

You wouldn't want to sit opposite me if I had to sit backwards on a train!! [chucking up emoticon]

People who go to the cash point and start to their whole years banking.
Holiday company's and airlines who triple the cost to co inside with every single school holiday.

I know the sound of others chewing has been done to death, so I'm going for the extreme oblivion that loud chewers suffer from.

Do you really not know that you're chewing your gum with your mouth wide open? Do you honestly not notice how horrific it is? Why must you insist on doing it all day every day. STFU!

State middle schools asking for money 'to help with buying stuff for your child'. Why isn't the state paying for it? And WTF did this start happening? A few years ago apparently, my Mrs informs me. Thanks for telling me. A stern letter will be written this weekend.

I thought it was illegal to call something homemade when it isn't.

Maybe they can call their massive factory a 'home' through some legal loophole.

I've not experienced that one, other than funding raising with a school Parents' Association, but that's for those nice extras such as playground equipment.

In my view your school should be explaining in advance exactly what the money is for and I hope they aren't actually using the word 'stuff'?! Otherwise, how will parents know (ie see the physical proof) that the school did use the money to buy what they said they would?

There have been many cases of school administrators stealing money from schools, so questions do have to be asked sometimes re where money is going.

not according to this
http://www.food.gov.uk/sites/default...itguidance.pdf

Yoda needs to get the rozzers in!

Ah, the old voluntary contributions. Costing us a small fortune

Cameron's Britain

That's up there with people who slurp when they drink tea or coffee . I mean REALLY slurp . I've come to the conclusion they most probably are slightly deaf as surely they must realise what a horrific noise it makes

The champions league, all the hype, the fact it's now just based on money and it's not even on proper tele anymore anyway.

People who give a monkeys about the "Champions" League

(sorry pallet)

Barclays Life Skills adverts

Anyone who changes their Facebook profile picture to a superhero / ribbon / picture of a sick child to 'raise awareness' for a cause

Footballers inventing new phrases and then using them to death.

See "Player A is on flames".

On flames? It doesn't make any sense. It's stupid, grammatically incorrect and must stop. These people are role models for Christ's sake.

Danny Higginbotham

I hate the champions league dont worry.

People who can see the lane up ahead is closed but still continue to the very last minute possible then cut in without indicating.

I'm praying all the British teams get knocked out in this phase, would be brilliant all that money spent by BT!

:D:D

I hate the way they have tried to big it up so much, it was nice to watch the odd game on a Tuesday but trying to get us to care about it as much as the premier league is ******* mental, nobody gives a toss about it.

Nice one BT :lux:

I need to update my location! I am not a Geordie (as I think we met at Watford) :hi:

And presenters, Bucky Jamie Carragher to Grumpy Souness "Is Cabaye a top player or a top, top player?"

[Micky Flanagan]

"You going aaht, or aaht aaht?"

[/Micky Flanagan]

Oh yes this pisses me off!

10,000 "likes" and we'll save this Gorilla.

When English teams are so sh*t that we finish 4th and miss out on Champs League.

People who keep sniffling on trains and don't blow their nose as they are too busy with their f****** phones.
Rant over

John Cooper Clarke

Places that say all day breakfast and they're closed at 7pm.

Is 7pm still daytime?

It is if you wake up at 3pm.

Pedants also annoy me.

Do days not last 24 hours any longer :(

Going into a 'family friendly' pub and hearing a song with the words mother fwcker in it. Then closely followed by a Dr Hook song. And now an Elvis impersonater has turned up. I'm off.

Family friendly pubs

I went to a cafe at 2.35 pm.with wife and son after dropping him back to uni. The all-day breakfast seemed to be just the thing for all of us.

However, the kitchen closes at 2.30 but they could do us tea and "snacks".

FFS!

Places that advertise breakfast and don't open till 9am.

That's ******* disgraceful. If I was in a pub with my child and that happened I'd have strong words with the owner.

Mind you, a Dr. Hook song wouldn't be too bad - nor would I be overly fussed by the mother ****** bit.

Getting stuck at a certain point in a computer game. You know what to do, but being inept do it over and over again until you throw the controller at the TV. However also being inept at throwing, then saves the aforementioned TV.

All Maggie's fault




:D

Couldn't decide between this and worst ad thread but Chris Moyles! What a c*nt.

Saved By The Bell by Robin Gibb.

For some reason this record popped into my head this morning and now I can't get rid of it. (No I didn't have the radio on)

Being shit at the talksport predictor league despite really trying hard to guess the scores based on form, injuries etc.

Apple Store. I hate the place.

People who smoke in crowded areas. I hope they all die slow, painful deaths sometime soon.