People who can't queue properly.

Surely, now that we've given up any European pretensions we can get back to being properly British. Orderly queue please

Schlange stehen!

Wouldn't the car seat be a clue though?

What if the car seat is in the car, but not the child? Then the emergency services are looking for a baby that isn't even there.

Maybe a 'baby not on board' sticker for when he or she's at school?

Or a 'maybe on board'

That's me on Dragon's Den. A baby on board sign with a slider so it can say 'not, don't worry about it rescue services'. Don't any of you bastards nick the idea until it's patented I know you snides.

He is isnt he. Match commentary and in the studio everything is doom and gloom attitude.

Ridiculously camp too :D

Tell you what feckin annoyed me today.Purshaced a shower screen from B&Feckin Q,got it home and started to fix to then realise half of the fixing kit is FECKIN MISSING.You utter:jerkit::jerkit:
On the plus side,me new Milwauki drill is bloody awesome :D

We are all waiting now...

I'll go halves with you on this idea. What you suggested but with a double illuminated sign on/not on. Like outside of motels with vacancy/ no vacancy. Let me know when you have patented it and will pm bank details.

:)

So the bbs getting like all fashions. Everything comes back in a few years. Have they had the my family stickers in the UK. They are annoying.

David Mitchell doing a Barclaycard ad,what a sellout

Watching england

Selling out from his ultra-Marxist roots you mean?

He's always struck me as slightly left of centre,used to write a thoughtful semi political column in The Observer

Two ads - Liverpool FC & Head and Shoulders

Players that, when they believe they have been fouled, fall over and grab the ball before the whistle has blown. I'm looking at you in this case Sterling. Love it if there was no whistle and they got booked with a foul going the other way.

Just broken into Iceland in Fuengirola and unplugged all their freezers. That'll teach them to be better than a load of c*nts.

That useless **** on the radio advert trying to describe the offside rule....it's like your nan trying to explain it, no bloke would start with "the ball is kicked"

Oh and whining Norfolk crybabies bleating about a tiny bit of flood water almost reaching ankle level at its worst.....if your soakaway is full and its still raining what the **** can I do to sort it....we don't carry magic wands.

:D

Every time I see a player do that it just compounds the sense of injustice I have for the free-kick awarded against John Lacy in the 83/84 season.
Everyone thought the referee had blown his whistle to indicate an offside decision, however, when the ball rolled back to our man Lacy he put his hand down to make it stationary prior to a, presumed, restart via an indirect free-kick
(pursuant to Law 11 - following an offside sanction). But no, the referee had made no such decision (or had forgotten that he had) and in fact sanctioned against Lacy for a deliberate handball with a direct free-kick against Palace!

It hurts, even now - it really hurts.

He's on some other bloody advert now as well in a lift. Pundit on BBC for the Italy game, TV turned over for ITV England game and there he is again. F*CK OFF.

I bet he's on the BBS as well the wank stained pissflap.

It's the BBC yet again

Barry Davis commentating at Wimbledon. I mean ffs

The one I don't like is Andrew Castle. On Monday he started talking about someones washing machine being deliver 30 minutes early.

I was unfortunate enough to sit opposite him for dinner once.

You're instincts are spot on. He's a right cock.:p

Headphones.

Saucepan lid handles that conduct heat. What c*nt designed those?

Typed with non burnt hand on my windows phone.

My pan handle conducts immense heat.

Is that a Florida panhandle?

Panhandlers are often frowned upon in fairness, although I always try to give

No it's a pan handle that sometimes turns into a pork sword.

Off the frying pan and into the oven it goes then

"narrative"

Cameron,Farage,Hodgson,Boris Johnson,hate em all.
Gareth Bale interviews,snooze,let your feet do the talking,Gareth.
BT wasting money on Alex Baldwin ads,is anybody gonna switch cos an American actor does an ad?
And of course,Christiano Ronaldo

Forgot to mention Corbyn,a showroom dummy would be better.
Plus Nani & Pepe

On the theme of 'Can I get', just heard someone having walked to the bar say "I'm going to get a pint of lager and a Malibu and Coke". Rudeness combined with shit speak c*nt.

Lionel Messi,choker

Help yourself then ****.

Only don't step behind my bar or I'll have to hit you with my Doberman.

Andy Townsend.

I hate this man with a passion. Such a knob. What's worse is he totally ruins the theatre of tennis matches with his amateurish commentary. Why has no one at the BBC realised this?!?

Imagine townsend doing tennis though with his monosyllabic commentary. 'Good serve there'. 'Murray needs to up his game'. 'Slight deflection on that serve etc etc'.

that ball-less squeaky screaming Icelandic commentator.

Mediafied Matt le Tissier talking about the new Southampton manager 'taking the club forward'.

Seriously what the FFS

Michael Gove with his flabby jowls, Eric Morecambe glasses & whiny voice. Like a fly round a piece of sh*t you want to swat but be careful of swatting the sh*t too.
Driving me crazy already

The girls I work with have just had a debate about which century the second world war was in. Stupid people annoy me.

People who fly up behind police cars and ambulances so when you pull over and then try to move back over near drive into your boot.

There's no sausage sizzles at any of the election booths near me tomorrow :(

:eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:

The way that some young women, I've only heard them do it, drag out the last syllable of the last sentence they say.

It like they have to emphasise it to check people are still listening and haven't topped themselves.

Yes, he is an unctuous buffoon.

He was absolutely spot on with his comments about Marcus whatever's girlfriend though - "I wish my dentist looked like that!"

Excellent, what were the differences of opinion? :D

People who throw your scraps of paper with important information on away.

Moving desks at work again.
This time, there are no light bulbs overhead - it feels like I'm sitting in a cave.
Tossers, bloody 'hot-desk' wankers.

The fact that in a few hours this man may very well be Australia's next PM. The cunt can't even eat a sausage properly, how is he supposed to lead a ******* country?

http://www.smh.com.au/content/dam/im...7431631526.jpg

At least it isn't this creep anymore.

http://resources1.news.com.au/images...ony-abbott.jpg

They are all a bunch of f'wits. Each party waiting for the other to **** up so they can have their turn "in charge". Rarely anything innovative to make significant changes. It's a game of musical chairs on the Titanic.

The over celebrating of goals in Euro 2016, it's now obligatory to include all squad members, back room staff, players wives and more

Johnny McEnroe is going to be the next Aussie PM ?

Bloody hell

I'd have gone for the mother. Massive bangers

As you were

More Frank Skinner than McEnroe :)

You cannot be serious.

Drivers that aggressively pull out in front of you, forcing you to slam on the brakes and then proceed to drive 5mph under the speed limit. :veryangry

Sky's clamour for Zlatan

#stickitupyerarse

Adele

I am going to do a Biggineagle here. Yep

The fact that the seat of Batman in Australia is not pronounced as Batman but rather as Bat-min

Started by those sheep shagging welsh.

Thought it was funny last night, Coleman thought the incoming William was going to hit him first

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2016/...7402234234.jpg

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/content/d...IB4HAWdEJE.jpg

http://ichef.bbci.co.uk/onesport/cps...v033837544.jpg

19th because it had a 19 in it didn't it? 18th because isn't it 18 for 19? Etc etc

If there's one country on earth that can challenge the UK for political ****wittery it's Australia and no mistake.

The slogan Keep Calm and Carry On. Represents a twee Britain of Daily Mail fantasy that never actually existed in the first place.

Bloody hell. Do you work in class 3 ?

That sounds like a real facepalm conversation.

Super slow mo showing anything other than the sporting action itself. Why the feck would anyone want to see some old tart clapping in the crowds bingo wings flapping around whilst I'm watching Wimbledon?!

Took me ages to clean the screen.

The slow hand clap during a players challenge at Wimbledon

Grow the **** up you quarterwits

Overuse of the words 'legend' and 'genius'.

Ha. Bingowings.

You legend.

Sudden influx of the word 'narrative'. Kin fvck the fvck off

'reach out', 'social media', 'Je suis...', 'mansplaining', 'unelectable', 'mandate', 'super'

Chris Coleman love-in. He's shite.

The use of roman numerals to get found swear filters can fuck off.

add world class to that.

When he is done with Wales he better not end up here

Always the same with some fans. He hasn't even kicked a ball for us yet but moan moan moan.

Exactly. And he's not even Irish.

People who put up signs saying 'No turning' in their driveway. Sorry but that's just a license to use their driveway to turn your car around even if it means driving back up the road and turning around again (preferably in another self styled 'no turning' zone.)

:)

Someone at work said 'i see you have signed Andy Townsend'. I had to set him straight on that pretty sharpish.

Being shit at super mario and coming last to a load of kids. Have challenged them to a train race, double or quits.

American pronunciation of entertainment. Ennertainment. Grrrrrr.

Innernet

Pisses all over our nob out manager that didn't have the balls to start the Punch in a final....

There's a paper towel over here called Bounty. Advertised as Bouny (grrrr). You'd think for an ad they would make an effort to say the product's name properly.

Absolutely Fabulous - terrible series,over the top,overacted,overrated,and now they've made a film

Watching the Germany v Italy game and hearing the CPFC song all the way through and not being able to stop singing it either out loud or in my head.

Aloominum

Rowte

Aluminum I can forgive seeing as they spell it that way (still wrong mind). Route though, you have a point. I guess the real bug bear regarding Ennertainment and innernet is that it's not a dialect thing, its actually the way EVERYONE says it, there's just no attempt at all to say the word as it's spelled. Mind you, this is a nation where a decent proportion of the population read ask as aks, so I shouldn't be surprised.

Bunch of Cuns

Edith Bowman

Strong bowman.

Hangovers in general.