It's only worth about 500 quid anyway. I think the number plates worth more. Starts HF03. Shame its not 05 someone on here might snap it up. Theres also a moulded eagles head on the front mud guard. Elgs and exiled Stirling have seen it so know it's true. Wish I knew how to post pics

Pm me the pic

At least you tried it.

Wimp. And said thread.

http://www.cpfc.org/forums/showthrea...highlight=Ouch

Fancy dress at the cricket.

Cricket

Happy days. 3 of the lights have gone out again. Suspect it's only temporary though.

.http://i.imgur.com/WMlwm26.jpg

You bastard. Post #33 has done more damage to my ribs. Now there's no chance of sleep tonight :clown:

Just wait until you sneeze

In a similar vein, people wearing crazy, fun festivals hats, 'you see me, I'm mad I am'

:jerkit:

I'm with you on that. Always put mine on when quality of light dictates no matter what time of day it is. But I've just bought a car which has no option to switch off the daytime running lights even on a very sunny day.

I know what you mean. I use a VW that has the same thing. I very rarely notice them unless I see the lights reflecting but it does seem like a waste in the height of summer. Handy when you're tanked up late at night and forget to turn the lights on full stop though. :D Only joking.

The 3 dogs opposite that bark at anything that moves. All day long. And well into the night.
And their totally twatty owners who just leave them in the front yards to act as intruder alarms.

I need to borrow one of Blind's firearms. With scope please Blind, I'm on the 9th floor but there's a good field of fire.

We have that sometimes at 2am. I go out with my Gandalf stick.

Drop a container on their heads.

Big feck off pictures of car dashboards that stop you reading the rest of the page easily.

and that after advising a fellow poster on how to post pictures.
Presumably it's going to be a much more common occurrence now.
Thanks elgin :veryangry

Touch screens in cars replacing buttons and knobs (no not that type) - who thought it was a good idea to use a smart phone interface for the driver travelling at speed who is meant to be concentrating on the road ahead? Good job autonomous cars are coming to replace the other type of knobs.

Hmm good point. May need to add that bit to the instructions.

I came off my moped (Sports may I add) as a 16 yr old at the end of Wembley way, when it had a petrol station on the roundabout because of a fuel spill. It was about 3 hours before the charity shield game, I was so embarrassed.

Came off bikes a good few times, only once being down to my error. Gave up on riding a bike in my mid 20s, once I had passed my driving test. Having had two bikes nicked added to my decision.

Make sure you do your business before turning up at mine as I still have a toilet seat that aint properly fixed to the toilet :)

You have toilet seats in Scotland?

Only loose ones.

:)

Yep and the deluxe ones come with a hole in it.

At the risk of leaving myself exposed to various political mud-slingers, I have been left infuriated by a new automated announcement at Kings Cross station this morning:

'Ladies and gentlemen, begging is not permitted at this station. Please do not encourage beggars and report their presence to our staff.'

Setting aside the grammatical error, it's left me shaking my head in dismay at where we seem to be heading at the moment.

I'm amazed they even have toilets.

They should pay the staff more then.

You really think that Scotland is so backward that it doesnt have holes in the ground?

Bloody hell.

It's terrible isn't it. Whilst some begging is organised/roma I can't help wishing for a 'trading places' scenario with the people who drag our country this far to the right.

I assumed they put out the warning, because David Davis was seen practicing his begging skills before heading over to the continent to resume his brexit 'negotiations'

Maybe it's my old age, but I agree.
I usually buy the beggars at Victoria a coffee (only 99p from Pret). Whenever I see a beggar, I think .... there but for the grace of god (go I)... you don't know if they had shitty parents, or mental illness.

There's a homeless guy at vic, he came to England from Portugal for a job in a hotel, the job never materialised... poor sod is now sleeping rough.

:)

See you in a bit BTW, I have to move chrisses motorbike for him first.

Coming over here, taking our park benches. Got no sympathy for him.

My boss. Not always, but definitely today.

Also, the company owner. Basically always.

Toilets and park benches? You Scots HAVE come far!

Lottery money innit. They make it back on the Buckfast bottles.

Great :hmph:

What do you think I am offering? a home for cripples or something? Him with a broken rib, you with a soon to be busted back. Go to the salvation army on Drip Road. They welcome your sort. Bloody do gooders that they are.

Sometimes one and the same. Sorry that should say 'often'.

I haven't ridden one since I passed my test in Cyprus. And actually it wasn't that much of a 'test' 'ehh just stop in them cones'. OK you've passed. 6 Cyprus pounds please. Go and buy an 1100.

I'm amazed you use holes in the ground, I thought you just did it in your hands and then smeared it on the walls of your huts.

Whatever you do dont make him laugh, not nice what with his broken rib.

So best crash it again. Do it properly and not in the half arsed manner he adopted.

Huts? luxury.

A little known fact. All trees in Scotland are silver birches. It is only because of our muck spreading that we appear to have a more diverse flora.

Shouldn't be difficult to achieve to be honest. He'll probably have wished he'd left it on the roundabout. Mind you if I fall off as well you'll have to drive our trains for us.

What can be difficult about that? Apparently Government sources are saying that even women can do it.

That **** Hammond is. I'd like to strap him to a rail. Grrr. He brings out the worst in me. Anyway see ya later.

:p

When people driving a car want to turn right from a side road onto a major road but hang back with the front of their car about a metre from the junction. Why?!?!

Them buggers changing the retirement age..

Gonna have to work an extra year, I'll probably be dead by then!

I resigned myself to working until I drop dead several years ago. The way things are going, I'm starting to think I might have to carry on working after I die.

Apparently The Weakest Link is returning with that hideous Robinson woman.

:confused: Don't know quite how to put this . . . But, when the telephone rings I answer it. If it is friend or family even if it is inconvenient I take the call. I maybe cooking or serving dinner, but I put myself out and have the conversation. I now find that it is now acceptable to look at who is calling and choose to ignore until it is totally convenient for them which could be a couple of days later. Well bugger you.

Work presentations - things like people leaving or special birthdays,generally cringy.

One-way roads that allow cyclists to go both-ways. Saw an accident on Lombard Street this morning where a pedestrian (who waited for a car to pass down the narrow road) stepped out and hit a cyclist coming the other way.

Oiks and ne'er do wells..
I stopped at the lights in Anerly Rd (Robin Hood) yesterday about 18:30, and this chap on a bicycle rode up close-ish and appeared to be sizing me up.. no problem there but it was a very warm evening and he was wearing a balaclava, the type with the eyeholes cut out.... without a shadow of doubt this fellow is up to no good
Doesn't he realize that this type of headgear significantly reduces his peripheral vision and could lead to an accident

Is anyone capable of holding a conversation without being bloody rude!? Working in the public sector has you constantly biting your tongue. The fact you can't pull people up on it makes my blood boil.

Why can't you tell people if they are being rude?

SOX compliance for a small UK company.

Is it because anyone then turning right into the side road they are on is then less likely to smash into their offside front bumper, since people cutting corners is a common trait, and one that really annoys me.

Can't upset the little darlings can you?

Why the **** not?

I'm as politically correct as you like, but I'll still have a word if someone is rude.

It was a nightmare for the medium sized US company I used to work for!
Good luck with that!

John Inverdale

Makes my blood boil

Millennials.

The fact that is even a word is annoying.

It's basically just an excuse for anyone aged 16 to 25 to be a rude, ignorant, lazy ****.

The biggest over-reaction to Corporate fraud you'll ever see. And hasn't stopped Corporate fraud.

The Tv programme 'Rip off Britain'. Just a quota filling exercise by the BBC. Some executive obviously thought,
"Lets get 3 old dears, thereby positively affecting our age and sex statistics, and get them to interview a load of incompetent f**k wits moaning about issues that are usually of their own doing, but with the premiss that they blame other people for their own lack of common sense".
I've worked with the general public for my entire adult life. Most of them are lying c-units, so why they are given air time to talk mostly shit about customer service issues is beyond me.

My neighbour car alarm going off about once a day. Usually at night!!

I really hate some of the current trends in TV programming.

1 - is where they take say '3 cases' that they want to cover and spread them out so that they fill the time needed for 5 cases by introducing the topic (typically the problem) and then breaking off to cover the next one and so on. Then they return to the first one and repeat half of the intro footage again before providing an update - and repeat. It's tedious and TBH lazy. In these days of rewind and catch-up it's not even vaguely legitimate. Homes Under the Hammer, most of those Rip off shows and its spreading.

2 - the reality shows couldn't be less 'real' and TBH even the spoof reality shows are like watching paint dry because they are probably more real than the reality ones. Just cheap TV filled by wannabes that clamour to be on there and do something outrageous for fame.

3 - the other which I have to admit works sometimes very well but strikes me as just plain lazy is that you take a celebrity and send him/her somewhere and they get a free jolly and you get to see staged edited highlights of what they get up to. It irritates me more because it again seems like lazy TV.

The dramas turned out on UK traditional TV are generally speaking outstanding and I cringe at the thought that the skill and effort that goes into those might be rewarded on the same level as the ***p above.


Sorry that was a bit whingey but I blame the weather,

Middle management wankers.

While on the subject of TV. Morning programme - Right on the Money, with Dom. Never again. Last week a woman who spent up to 200 quid a time on cakes for her family birthdays and had a personal trainer. She wanted to save money. Doh!

The way presenters/news reporters talk on TV like they've all gone on the same 'this is the way you talk on TV' course. Talking slowly, emphasising certain words, pausing on other words. Bloody annoying - weirdos!

Tom Bradby.. nothing embodies the dumbing down of TV news on mainstream television more than the delivery style of this chap.

Have to turn over.. Its like Newsround for challenged adults

Loads of 'seatbelts save lives' going up. Surely phone use is more of a problem?

Local radio DJs are worse. The women in particular all sound the same, sort of relentlessly upbeat tinged with a 'we're all in this together, never mind work and the traffic, we're all having fun here aren't we?' vibe.

I wonder if they talk like that at the breakfast table or in bed...

Cyclists are given far too much preferential treatment compared to other road users with the result that they act like sanctimonious morons to other road users and far too many behave very dangerously, particularly towards pedestrians. Really annoys me when they do, I am far more wary of cyclists than cars or buses.

They should be licensed and insured like any other road user and punished when they break the law.

Tube station announcers who are wannabe DJs trying to include some "banter" or adopt a "wacky" voice when making announcements. Its 8am, I'm tired, there are too many people and the humidity is unfit for cattle. Tell me when the next train is arriving in a normal voice and then shut the hell up.

It think it's more important they don't say ladies and gentlemen so no one feels left out.:afro:

Alan Shearers salary

'Feat'

Why is every modern pop song by blahblah FEAT. blahblah and blahblah. Just had a look at the current top 10 and 7 of the songs in it had a 'feat'.

Don't hate me but I think it's a good thing.

Because none of them are good enough to make a decent song on their own. And even in most of those songs the 'chorus' is just shit noise with no actual singing

Attempting to remove pebbledash from a period building

We've gone from needing to just send a small list of monthly payroll changes which took about 15 minutes to put together to spending an entire day having to fill in about 20 forms to get it through.

Tackling the company credit card account which has 20 cardholders totalling 1000+ transactions is going to be fun next week.

Jobsworths.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-40679075

Mike Bushell, sports presenter on BBC Breakfast. There is no sport/game so trivial or stupid that he won't get hyper-enthusiastic about. As soon as he comes on, the sound goes off.

Yes, it's all BS.

I had to go away for work last week and my wife came with me. Used my work CC for most expenses so at the end I owed the company a bit of money for my wife's share.

I went to Tesco yesterday and bought a shit-ton of biscuits for the staff to the value of what I owed.

That's how business should work :D

I was going to post him for often doing pieces on sports that have been made up because the inventor had failed at proper sports. Usually the report starts by saying that it's the fastest growing sport (one person has now become three because the cameras are there) and Rugfoothockeywrestling is sweeping the UK. Just for once can he look at the inventor, shake his head, drop the microphone and walk off!

This is so true, his narrative is utterly predictable too..."now you might think a dustpan and brush are just for cleaning up, but as you'll see, a man in Arbroath has different ideas...." :wallbash:

But the workers need to be taxed on that biscuit benefit.

I was taxed on the free lunch I had every day. And the Inland Revenue were weighing up whether free coffee from vending machines should be a taxable benefit...

Flask and lunch box, you lazy f*cker. ;)

People who insist on eating smelly food on a packed commuter train on a hot day in the middle of rush hour. Ars*hole!

We had a gourmet chef. City Boyz la-de-da, don't you know.

Costa coffee.

£6.88 per litre. To take away in those vile cardboardy cups. They know where they can poke it.

My tip would be to either to save your money or bypass the middleman and pour it straight down the drain.

London Bridge station, walkway between the underground train concourse bit and the tube station, needs a third separate lane for all the ******* SHAMBLING PHONE ZOMBIES stumbling about staring at their screens while the rest of us desperately try to get past them at a normal walking pace to get to our trains. Muppets.

The days when they did great coffee are long gone but they used to have a small shop in the alders arcade in croydon which did great coffee as well as selling decent blends - sad they sold out

Great shout. He's a dick & no mistake.

Great call

The rising crime figures,thanks Teresa May.
The shabby WiFi at Sutton train station.
The overpriced shop at Sutton train station,£2 for a bag of pastilles,they can spin on my middle digit.

Spreadable butter that quite clearly isn't ******* spreadable.

Boring tip of the day: Put the required amount of butter on each slice of bread/toast (without spreading) and proceed to cut cheese and slice tomatoes, by the time that's done your butter will spread without tearing holes in your tasty snack. Happy days.