You sound pretty chuffed at your own gluttony. :)

Once M&S gets properly "up north" (in about 30 years) you'll be able to enjoy :p

https://www.alamy.com/stock-photo-ms...122190756.html

Both proud and ashamed sir :):(

A yum yum is a donutty type product. Marvellous

And I think your Mrs should give you a good Yorkshire slap from me. Could you tell her please. TIA

The Worksop M&S Foodhall (who knew M&S did egg and chips, tripe and onions and pie chips peas and gravy ready meals) has just announced its intention to shut up shop.

Mo Farah

When phoning BT, I have to type in my customer number and am then asked for my customer number by the BT fella who eventually answers the phone.

I've just typed it in, you ****.

"Phoning BT" was enough.

My new pencil butane gas torch dying after 4 days.
I don't think it was because i set fire to my jumper but it happened at about the same time.

I get this all the time with various services. It really pisses me off also.

I guess the machine is only a gate to get you to a real person... apparently this info does not come up on a screen for the real person you finally get to.

Packaging that you can't recycle. No excuses.

Going club running & discovering most of it was mountain climbing. FFS if I'd wanted to do that I'd have become a hill wanker (you mean walker - Ed.) Er, no.

Thankfully change appears to be on the way, but it's painfully slow.

This
http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-n...shire-43328566
I really really get pissed off when I think that there are people that think like this. WTF is wrong with them. I just don't get it.

I’m shocked. Hope they get convicted and thrown out of university.

Disgusting. A pair of immature bullies using race to make others feel bad.

Things changing. A podcast I like a lot is moving to a new model where the new premium shit costs £240 a year on Patreon to get and part of the basic free one is becoming part of that, plus one of the hosts has essentially become a bit part player. Can't justify that cost (half a season ticket for one thing...) so basically it's a bit shit now. TBF the premium stuff will probably be great but still...

The div, who reads the sports news on BBC breakfast, pronouncing Thurles racecourse as Thurl. Its in fecking Ireland not France.

The moment a podcast expects money is the day I stop listening

That, though I live in a house with a wife and two kids who turn out turds everyday and a dughter who uses a whole roll of toilet paper to wipe, my wife thinks its the small bit of hair I just trimmed from my beard that blocks the toilet.

Jim Davidson and piers Morgan

Chewing gum
Just trod it into carpet
Wife not happy��

Drivers in such an apparent hurry that they pull out on you from a side road, but then decide to pootle along at 20mph in 40.

Trains, not content with turning up late half the time, leaving early

Sorry but why would you walk on a carpet in shoes you’ve just been outside in ?

People, animals and inanimate objects.

I'd hate to go that far as I love the hosts and they bring me a lot of new bands to listen to but it's rubbed me the wrong way

Gonks on mobile casually walking into the road. Generation f*cking idiot.

Not just his fvcking walk now

Mothers Day/Fathers Day/Valentines Day/Any gift giving ******* day.


Once Xmas is out of the way you think you’re in the clear until the birthdays roll round. How wrong can you be, these parasitic “days” that mean it’s compulsory for you to buy a ******* gift for said family member or forever be looked on as a cold hearted, tight fisted c u nt.


Truth is, I don’t mind spending the money, i just don’t care enough to be arsed to do it.

I haven’t got my mum or dad a mothers or fathers day card ever, as far as i can recall.

I don’t get the Mrs **** all either

They can all **** off.

People who consistently turn up late. I always make an effort to meet someone on the time agreed. It's not that fecking difficult

Things that annoy you
 

When i’m late, you’re just not that important.

I’m a very lazy and (my)energy efficient person.

don't come to Chile Pete.

The commentators on Radio London for our game yesterday. Confusing Sakho with Sako, pronouncing Azpilicueta like Equator and criticising PVA for not stopping Zappacosta when it appears its mostly down to Schlupp.

Birthdays and just about Xmas.
The rest of it fu@@off
When I had my first kid,I missed the the first mothers day.sorted out my mum.there was a good florist on the croham road
Where's my flowers ,his only 9 months old
Give me a break
Feckin touched and its no better

Because we don’t wear clogs down south.

You’ll be wearing one round your lughole if your Mrs sees that

People who move without looking.
As a motorist, it is dangerous.
As a pedestrian, it is annoying.

People who tap their feet to music. Especially when the floor is plastic and there is no other noise about.

Especially annoying when they're out of time.

Football stats that become fashionable to use as if are significant, but actually are an indication of **** all.

It used to be possession stats, and now the latest is 'he has never relegated a club'.

No probably because a club ends up sacking a manager before the season ends because of the perilous position the club have been placed in.

eg Pulis this season. Even more annoying will be if he takes Boro up he will be lauded and his part in the inevitable WBA relegation will be totally forgotten.

The **** whose car alarm goes off every ******* night

The difficulty of getting hold of lab VX these days.

The lack of game show hosts from my youth still with us.

(Apart from Jim Bowen, of course. How did he keep a straight face through it all? Innnnnn One. A teasmaid. Innnnnn Two. A set of luggage. Innnnn Three. A carriage clock....)

The mouse batteries going flat and moving mouse slowly. Then not being able to find 2 AA batteries in the house anywhere. Then the flat batteries not moving the mouse at all when put back in.

This is the essence of this thread.

Top tip.....Put the dead batteries on a warm radiator for half hour,will give you a few hours extra use.You can also gently squeeze in a pair of plyors to get the same result:p

and for a short term bit of extra juice just warm up in the palms of hands for half a minute or so.

Exiledstirling

varnorrag

3 sets of temporary traffic lights up at Crystal Palace Parade with Conway, inevitably, at the heart of it

^^^^^^this.

Sorry can't rep you garronrav as you are me.

Stick a bit of tin foil between the positive end and the silver plate in the battery area usually gets more power from the batteries and makes them work a bit longer

Or just go and buy some new batteries you tight arse knobbers

Understand your frustration but dont worry Gary I have done it for you on your behalf

Top tips guys. Got it working now. Found one battery under the tv and another one in the garage.

People (ok women) who wear shoes to the office but then realise they either don't fit or are too high etc and then spend the day walking around with no shoes on. Then do the same every day.

Few pins on the floor will put a stop to that.

People who look (for example in a shop window) then when they’ve finished they proceed to walk backwards away from the shop before looking where they’re going.

You wouldn’t do it if you were driving so why do so many knobs do this in busy areas?

But you can afford to go to Turkey and have scabby head disease.

Not about affording stuff. Its the principle that 'there must be some fecking batteries in this house' and not wanting to go out again having just got back in from walking the dogs.

PS i'll give you a scabby head disease in a minute, karate kid son or otherwise.

Lego is far more effective.

Made me laugh

Upturned plug accidentally kicked out as they come into range?

Yeah, course it is, scabs.

Tell them they've got the most disgusting feet you've ever seen. That'll get them back in the wellies in no time.

And easier to explain

People that cannot seem to go 20 minutes without having a telephone conversation.

Scab free son.

Soon to be hair free too if the feckers keep falling out.

At about a tenner a hair.

About 30p actually. Not that ive also wondered that or anything.

At least mine will grow back baldy.

A day long stomach bug.

Took a couple of classes earlier, horrid.

If your hair will grow back baldy, then it wont be growing back, scabzy.

Gotta feel for the students

Or spend over a hour talking to someone on the phone whom they see every day anyway

Well shit in ya hat and punch it.

It's not just women... half our office walk around with no shoes on, it's ******* disgusting.

One bloke is constantly taking his socks off and scratching his feet, too. He'll come to meetings with no shoes on as well.

Where do these people ******* grow up?

It's what happens when you eat food that someone else has made in some back street cafe.

Should've taken a packed lunch?

Well, far be it from me to pass judgement...

Karma korma?

When I get the usual have you been in an accident and weren't to blame phone call and play along with it, they put the phone down.

When the last person in the bathroom leaves only the one square of paper on the tube instead of loading a fresh roll.

I’m so so sorry

:D

Australia?

That is disgusting.

Once again Radio 5's overlong 'jolly' to Cheltenham forcing me to actually tune into Talksport :veryangry

I imagine they’re there as well, with the phenomenally untalented Andy Jacobs anti-broadcasting from the Paddy Power trough

Oh God H&J are there all week as well, just checked. I'd better re-engage my brain cells and put Radio 4 on.

The singing baby in The AA adverts. In fact "annoy" doesn't adequately convey how intensely irritating it is. It's nausea-inducing. It's skin-crawlingly creepy. It's devoid of any redeeming feature.

Is it one of those deliberately annoying campaigns that are cynically designed to worm their way into your subconscious or did a rational executive make the decision that it was endearing? My faith in human nature makes me hope that it's the former but I fear that it's probably the latter.

An advertiser seeking to be remembered is barely cynical. That is really what advertising is meant to achieve.

You see, I get this - I get the point of an advert is so people remember it, remember the product.

But, if an advert annoys me, however catchy/memorable, am I more or less likely to buy the product? Personally, I'd say less, but how much of that is down to conscious/sub-conscious decision making, I don't know.

I've heard some people say they'd close their accounts with Nationwide over their annoying ads - and I don't get that mentality. If you're with NW for a reason, that reason is valid however shitty the ad. Equally, it wouldn't stop me opening an account, but I'd look whether it was the best for me, not whether it had the best/worst jingle.

He is a Grade A twat, the way he states his opinion as fact sets me right off...moaning ****. Apparently he's a right stroppy bastard in real life and regularly storms off to his car when things don't go right for him on the cricket field. Sounds like a right manbaby.

It’s an interesting question, that was much discussed when I was in advertising, and probably still is now. There are certainly any number of case histories of famously annoying commercials which were equally famously successful. From Shake’n’Vac to Cillit Bang, all the way to today’s Go Compare.

I actually find him funny, he is so bitter.

Most advertising campaigns target product recognition, not only sales, right? Annoying overly repetitive ads certainly improve this aspect.

Good or bad publicity from this.

http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-43424172

Or simply WTF were they thinking?

Teams of teachers always winning the Parents' Quiz at my daughter's school.

He can’t even read bits out of the paper without fvcking it up. Stealing a fvcking living. He needs to flob in someone’s face sharpish.