Turning on Sky News and seeing Kay Burley -swiftly moved on!

Mayo and Kermode.

Smug self congrarulatory wankers.

Chinese take aways in Alloa being so busy on Christmas eve, to the point that one even stopped taking orders at 8PM I had to make do with an McDonalds last night instead of waiting over an hour and half for a delivery :(

Oh well, at least McDonald's can't forget the rice ;)

Great memory :)

Jake Humphries. Is there a more pointless individual in the whole of Sport broadcasting err Robbie Savage apart?

the fact that as soon as I get me hands wet in the sink I get an itchy nose

It's the same with my cock.

You dip your cock in the sink?

People on here who don't understand where we've come from as a club and act like Spurs fans assuming we should just win every game esp against so called smaller teams

Yes. Needs at least a foot.

Ben Fogle

Me sometimes esp when I've had a few drinks

Having been bought an article of clothing for Xmas, realising that it is probably 2 sizes too small, and then when questioned, the giver of the present said that the shop didn't have my size. No receipt. Utterly pointless.

hotukdeals.com

Too bloody tempting

All the same types of tosser 'celebrities' who sit and voice their options on TV shows or whatever. I don't mind the actual people involved in the making of the shows talking about it, that makes it more interesting but who gives a shit what James fat arsed Corden thinks or Rachel f*cking Riley? Self important bitch. She's just a very clever mathematician who works on a shit game show for old aged bastards. And 'supports' The Wankers.

I suppose if she reads the BBS, sees this and something else I posted about her a couple of weeks ago that's my chances of a shag gone.

But Keith Lemon, love him or hate him isn't an actual person, just a made up character.

My brother. The selfish fat ****

Eh? Not very Christmassy.

I'd forgive Rachel Riley for being a wanker, or even watch her wank, if I got a chance of sticking my cock up her bottom.

Christmas is over. OVER. No more bastard child brussel sprout advert on every ad break.

People questioning whether you're a proper palace fan or not. I see it more and more these days, and it happened yesterday in the pub during the Bournemouth game. It's the same crap you had to put up with in the school playground in 1990. I'm not going to start protesting too much just because other palace fans are paranoid. And who gives a shit anyway? And why would palace's current position attract new fans anyway: it's sixth position, not a bloody FA cup final. All Palace's new success has done is make it more physically uncomfortable to watch them - craning one's head in the pub or standing on tip-toe on the Arthur Waite. I doubt it's something your average scallywag or glory-hunter is going to be that attracted to. So why the paranoia? Honestly, people must look at the championship years like it was some sort of penance.

Players in any sport wearing number 23

Stalkers.

The fact that Christmas Day barely feels any different from all the other bank holidays now. It used to have such a special feel but like a lot of other things it has definitely gone down the shitter. Such a shame.

People who pretend to be Palace fans but when you read between the lines, you realise - they haven't got a clue.:rolleyes:

Ant & Dec....

Bit of an odd game to be questioning the loyalty of your fellow fans, considering how many loyalty points one needed to get tickets for the game.

Would a proper Palace fan know how to spell the name of one of our greatest chairman for instance.

Is that an age think do you think?

Drivers who cut you up in a desperate bid to overtake you then get their phone out at the next red light and don't notice it's gone green

Excellent point.

PATRICK BAMFORDS HAIR

Merry thingy Barry. Off topic I know, but f v c k it. :hi:

on his last day with us? Give him a good send off ay?

See you next weekend in the Pawsons Barry?

I would slap that little cow. Eat ya sprouts ya basa.

And to you & Mitch & a happy new thingy as well :p:hi:

Yes mate Paul told me yesterday you were over

TV, I put the tv on for the first time over Christmas and sat there and watched an hour of 'Britain's most expensive food' and about 15 minutes of gogglebox and was ready to cut my wrists, no wonder I just don't ever turn it on any more. To think people sit and watch that shit night after night, it is no wonder we are a depressed nation.

poor Pape :(

People saying 'taking some fluids on board'.

Only acceptable whilst standing in the boozer

Two from me:
People who go out in public in their pyjamas, grow up.
Also my wife, having a go at me for losing the cat, making me then go around the garden calling for it, for it to be asleep in the spare room all the time.

Cats. F*ck off.

The cat in question

http://i.imgur.com/zrL3oPX.jpg

Moody barstard

That's EXACTLY how I imagined Dave looks just before he closes another thread

Do cats have Downs Syndrome?

Its a Persian.

Not Mogolian then.

A terrorist cat?

It appears to have a duster for a tail

FWIW my cats have been misbehaving today

Did it get into an argument with a hedge trimmer?

He'd look great with a monocle

Here are mine pretending to look guilty

http://i.imgur.com/Tlx3C0V.jpg

:D He actually would!

I've found Pallet's cat taking a ride on Gerry Francis.

http://www.qpr.co.uk/cms_images/gerr...03_478x359.jpg

blue jeans :)

Sorry but that is the strangest looking cat I've ever seen

People with stupid looking cats

He had a lion cut, he is normally just a great big hair ball.

Sorry to tell you its not. Ever heard of the song 'Twelve days of Christmas'

We are currently on Day 5

(Eyedee WILL be pleased)

If I had a cat and it looked like that - I wouldn't let it out either....

If I looked like that I'd be hiding in the spare room too

This man got hold of him.
http://i2.ytimg.com/vi/DV2qiOeUT9E/0.jpg

Prolly ringing their mates, laughing at you and ting, innit. ;)

No wonder he's moody with you.

Not knowing what day it is.

My sister buying my daughter a iPhone case for Christmas and letting her open it on the 23rd. Thus spoiling the surprise that we had got her a iPhone for Christmas.

Gorgeous. Ours had to have that haircut once.

http://nyti.ms/1kkwUcv. The Killing of Farkhunda....more than annoyed.... Sickened!

Beyond evil. I can comprehend one or two people being mentalists, but there were a few hundred there. What a ****ed up society.
RIP Farkhunda

Cinema trailers. I just want to see the film I have paid for.

... Patrick Bamford...

Jesus man, I possess their doubles

I'm going to take a stab in the dark here... But my money is on Little Al being annoyed with recent developments on this thread :D

You would win the bet.

Shit puns on movie posters

Bone breaking handshake grip. Wtf. What actual impression do they think they're making?

Powerline adaptors that work then stop, work then stop, work then stop. They give you just enough hope that everything will be OK, then die again.

I was introduced to one of these twats at work... what a f*ckwit. It didnt convey an air of confidence and strength of character, it hurt my arthritic hand and just showed what a di*khead you are... i wont be doing any business with you and probably bad mouth you to all that ask - so it had quite the opposite effect.

Footballers who dive......especially Ashley Young ( now that Drogba has left the building )

The only answer, Yosser.

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=7v-mcQSES5U

Having seen an ad for The Voice, a reminder to me that Will.I.Am is Room 101 material

Because t imho it beats a wet fish handshake any day

Some mediocrities getting gongs, then they tag ' and for services to charity' on the end so you are not sure whether they deserve the award or not

sweet talk and kissing after sex. utterly pointless.

Just watching Why sharks attack on Eden channel on Sky....its cos their *****!

Some bloke crying about the fear after the attack... He has a scar on his arm.....Man up you Wanker go get a big **** arse gun and go shoot some of the ****ers! There's only one premium Hunter on this planet and its us!

absolute thunderc un t of a man. Of all the people I want to see get a good slap, he's in the top 3 of my imaginary list. One of those people who are too cringeworthy to function

Seconded.

Sweet talk and kissing before sex. Utterly pointless

Sweet talk and kissing during bum sex. Not only pointless but impossible. Especially when she's gagged.

I take it that it will be the dry version of said botty sex. Would be disappointed with you if you went in for all this lube bollox

You've seen the strap-on he got his wife for Xmas on the other forum...he needs the lube.

In the past, if I was attending a business meeting with someone that needed putting in their place, I would open with a bone crusher:D. But otherwise, your point stands

When you are sitting on a tube train a day woman sits next to you , but decides he bag should be half on you and half on her.

Every delivery company in this country Royal Mail aside, they are all ******* useless. Been sat in all day waiting for a delivery from B&Q (sent out with Parcel force on next day delivery) Not one bit of communication that it was even out for delivery today, just phoned up and been told it was attempted 2 hours ago and they couldn't get into the flat so ****ed off without even calling me or emailing to say failed delivery. After 30 minutes on the phone to B&Q I am told to pick it up from the Parcelforce depot an hour away or wait until Monday when I will be back in work and they will try again. It really isn't difficult.

And I will exclude Royal Mail from this rant because at least they leave a card to say they have been and have a pick up office local everywhere I have lived and I've never had a problem with them, touch wood.

Posts where the meaning remains tantalisingly out of reach.

Isn't Parcel force part of Royal Mail?