John Pienarr is great...and a Palace fan.

EFA

Paul Morley - sneery git

Joggers, runners on 10k runs, half-marathons, etc taking over cities and parks nearly every weekend it seems.

Dog walking businesses walking 20 dogs in the Park

Funny you bring this up... I was about to post something similar.

Along the coast line here in the Los Angeles area we are lucky enough to have a fantastic designated bike path that runs for approximately 20 miles along the beaches. These paths are clearly marked as bike paths and even have stick man bikes painted on the concrete periodically along them.

Inevitably every Saturday (the day I want to ride my bike along these paths) there is some sort of charity 5K, 10K, half marathon etc, that the organizers seem to think the bike path is perfect for.

Case in point this morning. I wouldn't mind if they ran in single file, but no they have to run/jog 4 or 5 across taking up most of the path.

I always put their spacial awareness issues down to lack of oxygen getting to their brains when they are running.

:D ironic from a cyclist! At least the joggers aren’t clogging up the roads like all the fat Lycra wearing Tour de France wannabes...

100 per cent is a bad enough response to a question. The now increasing use of a million per cent deserves stabbings.

It seems to me that just saying "yes" is much less laborious than stating grandiose and impossible percentages. One mullion percent is like, so last year. Totes.

Trust me... the cyclist piss me off also, and I'm one of them!

(Disclaimer: apparently everything pisses you (I mean me) off when you turn 60!)

I stood in for my boss at meetings the last 2 weeks while she was out of town on business. From day one I was getting pounded on for information and updates like the **** I would know! Got the hang of it by the last day, but still no fun.

The big boss asking question has a habit of locking in eye contact with you and asking a rhetorical question... A couple of times I muddled through a response, but not actually sure if I was supposed to.

All very annoying and glad to not be doing that again any time soon.

People who use laptops on commuter trains and seem to type in utter fury.

Either get a f*cking life and leave the work in the office or get a keyboard protector so I don't have to hear that rancid tapping.

People pronouncing specific as 'pacific'

People pronouncing nuclear as 'nucelar'

People pronouncing H as 'haitch'

It's 'put up, OR shut up', you thick f*ckers.

[QUOTE=Neillo's Son;13884896]People who use laptops on commuter trains and seem to type in utter fury.

Either get a f*cking life and leave the work in the office or get a keyboard protector so I don't have to hear that rancid tapping.[/QUOTE

That's Maz or Biggin you are commuting with.

Every website you visit now a stupid 'Instant Chat' box appear.

Can I help you?

Yes, you can start by pissing off.

People stopping in the middle of the street all of a sudden to take a selfie and then doing a ridiculous pout not only annoying but intensely sad

Yeah. I dont want to chat when I'm watching xhamster

Nicola Sturgeon on Andrew Marr this morning, starting every answer with an aggressive and very annoying 'LOOK...'

Damn right!, Plus when you go to click the back button a ******* discount voucher pop up.

So much pent up anger on here

Oh not another Man U wankfest on the bbc

Drivers who slow down at traffic lights anticipating a red light:veryangry

People that say ‘I’ve run a marathon’ when they’ve run a half marathon.

Depends how they got back again I suppose....

People who mispronounce pronunciation

However, saying skelington is absolutely fine in my book :)

Add in people who don't ask but arks

init

I genuinely find "asked" (but never "ask") difficult to say. I usually just use "ast".

People who say 'arsed' when they mean 'ast'.

Already reped you for the marathon comment so wouldn't let me for this. Must spread rep etc

I blame my South London accent and the fact I was pretty dim at school (some may say still am), but I was into my 20's before I found out "chimney" was not "chimley", and I also thought it was "hand gliding" not "hang gliding", not that we did a lot of "hang gliding" in Croydon or Bromley!

I digress...

How else would you/should you say it?

People who send spam email. There ought to be a special place in hell for these oxygen stealing wankers.
Most TV ads except Specsavers and the Trivago lady.

Funny but it seemed like we all said 'chimley' in those days. Why was that?

Chatted with him a couple of times in the AW back in the Noughties when he had his young sons with him.
A true gent.

I blame Dick Van Dyke for changing it.

Or maybe it's like Greenwich and Woolwich.... it really is pronounced different to the way it is spelled?

Oh yeah, Defillee:sleepy:

I assume skel-e-ton rather than skel-ing-ton?

Add another one to my list.

Bloody Noah! :veryangry

Idiots on scooters.

People that wear a watch and have the face on the inside of their wrist.

Especially adults.

Yeh, what the **** is that about?

Jewlery

Especially adults on them in Central London during rush hour.

yEAH WTF
 

Yeah wtf, and those that look at their watch when the event is days away

You sure it wasn't 'chimbley'?

I think we alter words a little to make them easier to say (surely it's 'hambag', unless you're Lady Brackell?), so I'm surprised you thought it was 'hand gliding': bit of a mouthful that, 'hangliding' is much easier.

Chiminey?

Children's books with black font on a dark blue page. If you're reading a child a bedtime story, it's impossible to make out the words unless the lights are all the way up.

Nope.

I feel your pain. When my children were smaller I'd have to add lib sections of the 'Owl that was afraid of the dark', other children's books are available, they never noticed. Then we got them night lights with torches attached.

And "Chimley". What a non word!!

people who mix "bought" with "brought".
I "brought" this in Sainsbury's on Saturday. Thick idiots.

I'm glad you bought that up. Drives me nuts.

Reminds me of a joke .....

Bloke goes to the doctors.

'Doctor I've got a steering wheel attached to my cock'

'What's the problem ?' Said the doc

'It's driving me nuts'

I'm here all week

People who tell really corny old jokes.........

:frown:

Heard a lot of people say "swimming bars" instead of "swimming baths", when I was a young 'un.

Wasting an hour and a half earlier trying to remove a rogue device with a Chinese Mac address from my Wifi router only to find it was the Sky HD box i'd forgotten to account for.

I can't say any word containing "th" properly. Not sure if it is a speech impediment or my accent.

Nah Bob, yer just a bit fick

I think there's some truth in that.

For many years I managed to convince myself that there was a real terrorist threat from the Provincial IRA, that is the branch of the IRA that was centred on the Province of Ulster.

This was despite continually reading about the Provisional IRA.

I used to think that Pink Floyd were singing about 'no dog's orgasm, in the classroom'.

Answering a question by starting with " So..... "

One of the most annoying things ever, I just don't get why people what start an answer with it.

Because all cyclists stick to cycle paths where designated.... :veryangry

My old man says sangwich instead of sandwich. Dunno if it’s any easier to say though. Possibly.

Maybe they are working on the train so they can get home to their lives earlier instead of being stuck in the office

St Pancreas

:D

Well the path in question here is build on the sandy beaches... ever tried riding a bike through sand? :supergrin:

We used to deal with a company called Thor Aerospace.

I had a real problem with that one... or at least the people in the room with me had a problem with me saying Thor.

And don't ever ask me to say the number 33!

I’ve never been able to say “I’d like to pay”. It’s a dreadful impediment but,apart from that, I lead a normal life.

I have the same problem with, "Let me get that"... ;)

I do the same but the most annoying thing is that once in a while someone you are speaking to will all but stop the conversation to repeat the offending word in their own slightly exaggerated perceived annunciation as some sort put down. Hands in pockets time to stop my fist (no 'th') permanently altering the way they talk!

Try 333,333 or even 334,334 etc.

Bus Lanes

- Not enough buses run to warrant them.
- They cause more traffic issues then they solve.
- The varying different DAYS and times you cannot use them - that changes from one bus lane to the next.
- The cameras that get you nicked when you just cut across the end corner to join the regular road again.

Brilliant, but what the f*ck is going on in your head!? :D

On a related note, I used to love this campaign.

Oh, go on then, one more (for those who remember what a cassette was...).

There was a decent music wholesaler who named his company Ears Are Alight. Always related it to Dekker obviously, but had quite forgotten that campaign!

Ha.

I used to think the words to Chic’s “Le Freak” was in fact “Africa”

https://youtu.be/h1qQ1SKNlgY

That I have just lost 1.5 hours to internet video bollox..........AGAIN!!!!

Children in offices. Even more so when the child is your own :D

:)

Louise Redknapp. If you're leaving your husband to shag someone else, just get on and do it and stop bleating to the press about how terrible your life is.

Chorus of this Black Box tune sounds like 'Salad Cream'. 1.05m onwards...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=18N2k1TBBRE


By the way is that video quite early-1990s enough?

I'd seen the headlines on papers, but ignored it obviously.

Your post made me go and look to see if she was really leaving to shag someone else. Seems not, she's leaving him so she can work ?!?!

Anyway, your post, for making me read that shit.

Regardless of whether she did or not, her bleating to every newspaper about her marital life has annoyed me. You married a moderately good footballer, you left him, no-one cares.

except you.

I was convinced for years that the second line in Eno's 'King's Lead Hat' was 'four Pakis in a big black car'....

:) always loved that track!

And for an extra point, the track's title is an anagram of which band produced by Eno ?

Talking Heads

Took me ages to find that out !

I bought that album when it came out, and still have the four prints that came with it - sells for about £300 now.

Remainers ......... feckin eejits

U2