Similarly, the new software update for my phone now wants to record when I'm sleeping. I think I know when I've been asleep thanks.

Can I recommend taking a packed lunch to work?

I do.

He needs a bigger lunch box. Something for a snack towards the end of the shift.

PeterH threads.

I'm going to trivialise the seemingly never ending barrage of sexual harassment stories in the media by declaring how annoyed I'm becoming with the pronunciation of the word 'harassment'.

In my book it should be said as in (ironically given the subject matter) 'her ass', with emphasis on the second syllable.

But every man jack on the TV and radio seems to opt for the first syllable emphasis, similar to the surname Harris.

It's probably me but I'm not changing now after 45 years.

shitty old laptops

His hours are being cut for winter. He needs a smaller lunchbox now, surely.

Changing season coughs/colds.

Still a long shift. Makes me feel lazy.

Need something to keep you going if you only have cold porrige for breakfast and an oatcake.

You dont have to read them. Strange thing to get annoyed about.

One would suggest you are trying to get in with the popular kids.

And people having packed lunches isnt? You really have turned into Alf.

My mother-in-laws car, which I use during the day to ferry my daughter about, has just got FM and AM channels and no CD player. I'm forced to listen to one shower of commercial sh*te song after another. Every song laced with the same irritating, soulless production and warbly singer with the sh*ttest most cringeworthy meaningless lyrics you could ever imagine.

Mostly stick to Radio 2, but then have to endure Fern Cotton who is like BBC made robot, spouting one cliché line after another. The woman has no personality whatsoever.

I've switched the radio off and taken to singing various Palace songs to amuse my daughter instead.

The problem there is at some point she'll ask Mrs Bubbs why Ron Noades mother is a w....

I usually start off with radio 5 until that chippy twat Campbell does my head in (usually about 5 minutes), move on to radio 2 until Evans drives me mad with his self promotion about bloody carfest, (another 5 minutes),whip over to radio 4 until bloody thought for the bastard day.

The last fifteen minutes of my drive to work are normally in silence.

My kids like the one about where West Ham can stick their bubbles by the way.

Well, it's the least enjoyable day of the year today.

Payday is never not enjoyable!

Not at all, I couldn't be more unpopular with the kids and am happy with that. They just seem to be pissing competitions.

My sister and brother and in law who think it is ok to turn up at my house at 10.50pm.

I'm no kid....you are popular with me though....hth

Royal Mail - tracking says "parcel was left with a neighbour and we've left a card to tell you which one". No card, and neighbours haven't got it. Call RM and they tell me I need to go to the sorting office to check to see if they have it.

Very helpful.

Thankfully the lady at the company where I ordered my goods from was very helpful and is sending the item out again tomorrow and will follow up with RM. Seems customer service still exists in some places.

This Halloween shit...

Do you mean what Hallowe'en has become, or what it should be?

What is should be, is fine.

What it has become is a pile of commercialised rubbish.

That reminds me, can I have your address so I can send you a Halloween card.

Last orders ?

The London Underground safety poem announcement for using escalators. Beyond parody.

Fair one that. I am not a fan of any random visits, but have to accept them from the wife's family. There should be a 9pm watershed, though.

I get my pay on the 8th of each month. Ridiculous.

Meh.

I get paid once a year.

Finally a code of etiquette seems to be in use where you don't knock on the doors of grumpy sods like me who haven't got decorations out.

Annual dividend?

I can lend you lunch money for a week if you like :D

I tape up the door bell and lay a few Claymores, just to be certain.

You've seen the size of me...will be a big lend!

People posting photos of their houses decorated in Halloween shite all over Facebook.

There's a large Victorian house in my street that must have had hundreds spent on decs. They even had a dress rehearsal last night to test the lights. Arseholes.


https://iloveprimrosehill.files.word...0295.jpg?w=940

It seems it's getting as competitive as OTT Christmas decorations for some.

Enter into the spirit of things with them by lobbing a brick through their window with woooohooo written on it on some other really scary Halloween type word. :p

:p

People that order stuff to be delivered, knowing they won't be home.

I don't get annoyed by people having packed lunches. I am bemused by people making a habit of having them.

If you have a lack of reading skills, you probably should avoid teaching TBF. Unless you are cleverly twisting words to suit your agenda.

I am only posting this on here, because you and your sheeplike mates don't have the BBS skillset needed to keep it all on one thread. Perhaps, you can post an hilarious 'packed lunch' aside on the matchday thread on Sunday.

I can't say for the UK, but Halloween here is pretty cute really. They tend to be young kids in groups, dressed up, and walked around by their parents. No tricking. The older teenagers tend to get dressed up and go to a music event. Lots of goth music, 80s new romantic, that kind of thing.

At least, no-one being a nuisance.

Actually we requested delivery on Monday, but they came Saturday :jerkit::supergrin::love:

The bastards.:love:

Coming early is a big problem for many people.

People who put 'Beware Baby on Board' stickers in the back of their car.Ok I won't crash in to the back of you now!:wallbash:

There's a trend for putting 'L' plates on cars I've noticed recently when they're blatantly not 'learner drivers', presumably to be given space.

It's an Alanis Morisette 'ironic' type of thing.

I find the presence of a hat, usually a trilby, on the rear parcel shelf to be an excellent advance warning of erratic driving ahead

Especially when you're not even in :veryangry

We were told that actually the emergency services like them so they know if they're searching for a kid in the wreckage...

The police up here in Edinburgh; sat on their fat arses in their cars at the side of the road just watching traffic and waiting for an easy nick.

Surely there are more constructive ways to spend their time?

Those little fish things from one of them churches used to be the same

The TV programme 'Celebrity Hunted'. I like the normal version of this programme, but this celebrity version is for charity.

There's a couple of posh twonks on it from some kind of mind numbing so-called reality TV show. You know, the types who need a good slap around the face such is their lack of common decency towards normal people. The hunters keep missing these two by a few minutes.

I cannot help but think that the programme's core target audience are the kind of idiots who worship these twonks and who are most likely to give to the charity. Or am I being cynical? Anyway, watching these two self opinionated morons is making me feel sick.

Phil Neville - fvck off with your buoyancy, you’re not fooling anyone

Only if you take it out everytime there is not a kid on board.

I took ours out the first time I saw it!

Beards.Just check out the one Maz is sporting on his/her profile page.Whats the point and usually just makes people look ridiculous......

A hat on a driver’s head is much the same.

I couldn't see her beard there.

People that over take in their cars when there is a slow flow of traffic and many cars in front on a single carriage road. On my commute to work, the flow of traffic was going at approx 30 mph and the dick behind me thought it was necessary to overtake me knowing it there was a mass of traffic ahead with no where else to go - what's the point you penis!

Only in winter months

Don't be angry. You may start growing one when you reach 16

Do you live in Spain?

Sussex :angel:

The dreariness of modern football.

We now have wall to wall football coverage on TV, radio, the internet, podcasts, etc.

Yet it feels like an intellectual wasteland. I feel like outside of the transfer window nothing happens. We play the occasional game then sometimes have to wait weeks until the next one.

I love the idea of an emergency loan but even that simple pleasure is now denied to not just the Prem but the FL as well.

I feel I am in angry limbo, something has to be done to sort my club out, but what’s the point of moaning about it when the rules prevent anything happening. Just the fortnightly hope Roy might pull a rabbit out the bag.

Also, dear football media, I really don’t care about the so-called top six.

Vapers ******* hate them with a passion, partly for personal reasons but it is 10x more antisocial than smoking


http://www.cpfc.org/forums/attachmen...1&d=1509541474

And they so stupid with those big metal things.

Yeah don't mind the fag or pen shaped but the industrial ones with weird flavouring are awful

Dont show this thread to CT.

The latest sky sports advert for super Sunday that looks like it was put together by the work experience kid, dreadful.

That I've found out this week there is such a thing as gender reveal cakes, which are cut open at gender reveal parties to announce the sex of a forthcoming baby by new parents, who are a group in society who really do need more reasons to celebrate themselves what with baby showers (dreadful) also now becoming prevalent

You give the kids treats for their packed lunches, yes?:p

I served sweet breads for our little Johnny's GRP.

Windscreens that steam up without you doing anything.

People that use the term matie. Mate or nothing, ta.

Stop hanging round with sailors.

I thought that was a reply to Elgin's post ..

[emoji3]

Modern life and all its shit. Fake news is now a word. So what and whats the point of fake news anyway?

:supergrin:

Crap mattresses that prevent sleep rather than aiding it. Feck all to do with sailors too.

Solve your mattress issue here

https://johnryanbydesign.co.uk

Very strongly recommended.

Bringing the washing downstairs, putting it on, then walking back into the hallway only to realise you've dropped a sock and pair of knickers on the hallway floor or stairs........again :wallbash:

Cheers.

I'd rather not sleep than spend that on a mattress! :D

We have a pause button on our machine - any time within the first 10mins or so you can pause it, open the door and add stuff. Or remove the coin/tissue/ear-phones your wife has left in a pocket and just remembered...

The Spurs fan at work thinking that I am at all interested and want to spend my morning talking about them.

Maybe you haven't dropped them and your wife is leaving a seductive trail....

Is it made out of the tears of children?

Ah, but think of the payback you might be able to give them on Monday morning.

I bought a Silent Night orthopaedic mattress in the last 6 months to replace the 10 year old memory foam one and I have to say, it’s f—King shocking! So much so we had to go out and buy a mattress topper. Everything it advertised is just bollocks - wished we’d stuck with the old.

Mattress prices look OK to me. Spent nearly a grand on my last one!!

(Regretting that now, having seen this).

EDIT - Just seen the Artisan ones. Feel better now.

Does it come with a free thermomix?:)

A grand?! Alright big balls.

Its a five to ten year investment. Seems reasonable to me.

Definitely, when you work it out on a per night basis. A mattress is probably the place in your house where you spend far more time than anywhere else, so it should arguably be one of the most expensive things in your house.

I go told by the missus to dump our 15 year old tempur as it had rips and holes in it. This spring thing is shit.

You drop your knickers in your hall? Dirty bitch.

People who don't walk in a straight line - specifically when sober. Tried to pass a pedestrian the other day and which ever side I chose, they veered in that direction (possibly on purpose LOL). Or when walking by my side, the wife veers towards me.

Hotels built next to a Freeway/Motorway... why?

Hotel rooms that have an illogical thermostat.

Hotel rooms that you have to turn the handle up to get into, rather than down.

Being away from home, flying and staying in a hotel and having to visit companies when you've go a stinking streaming cold.