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You are second only to any idiot that attempts to lay back there seat on any flight, and if you attempt it dont dare mutter if my knee is in your back, it would be worse if I had room to move it...... |
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It pisses me off no end when people start saying "excuse me" to get nearer to the doors as we are approaching their stop as they barge through everyone. If we are approaching my stop, I make a habit to not move, ignore them, then make intense eye contact as I get off the train in front of them to make them realise how stupid they are. Also on the topic of tubes, people who refuse to hold on to anything as they are reading/think they are surfing only to use everyone around them as leverage when the tube moves around unexpectedly. I had a guy blatantly do this when standing next to me so I waited until approaching the next stop and shifted my weight slightly and he fell over into a bunch of people, I hope he learned his lesson. |
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Yeah, my stop is the end of the line and there's always a queue forming near the doors 5 minutes from the end of the journey. I take great joy in making sure i'm sat by the door, staying seated until we get to the station and then getting into the front of said queue.
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A fairly specific one, but I'm sure there are others on here who have experienced this....
Middle-class white males aged between 18-35 who live in the south of Croydon (Selsdon and Purley I'm looking at you), and upon entering a Kebab Shop or Barber shop immediately have to put on the most ridiculous mockney accent and mannerisms and treat every member of staff like their long lost Cypriot brother, shaking their hands one by one and asking them if they are "alright boss/chief/George/stav" It happens every time I go to Selsdon, but I've never experienced it any other establishment or in any other area to be honest. In fact, whilst waiting in Selsdon Kebab Centre I've often seen these people come in, shake hands with George and the rest of their brothers, enquire as to their well being and then just leave again without even buying any food. They just come across as completely insincere tits. |
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education inculcation |
rucksacks on tubes
kids who put there feet on train seats |
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Paying god knows how much for a dish in a good restaurant only to find that the veg that you need with that Sea Bass aren't provided and have to be ordered. Just put it all together on the menu.
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It should not matter if I'm the last person on the plane, there should be a place for my official sized carry on bag. |
Peope who arrive late on planes and hold everyone up.
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Duvets only hotels. In the age of choice just give me a sheet and blankets.
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Suitcases on the train, if you can afford a holiday you can afford a taxi.
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Passengers that work on the plane.
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I've got the last flight out of Malaga a few times and it's always delayed about 45 mins. When you get to the gate there are loads of people queuing. Ten yards past the queue there is plenty of seating and a large window that overlooks the runway where you can clearly see if the plane has arrived. Looking at the queue and seeing that the plane isn't there yet amuses and irritates me in equal measures. |
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slow-close toilet seats. I need a shit now, not in 5 minutes when you're done descending, thanks
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I was on a plane to Sydney today. Guy next to me farted non stop LOUDLY for the full hour
Never wanted to kill somebody until today |
Someone has left the lid off the Toothpaste tube and the end dries up and hardens. This bit is then squeezed onto my toothbrush and makes me gag when brushing..
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Witless, humourless, incessant posters posting the same negative things every page in GPD
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The symbolic equivalent of 'end of' or 'FACT' :) |
Haemorroids FACT end of.
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Period. |
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Women ( and they are fully entitled to equality in all issues ) who consider that swearing and being pig ignorant and acting like men is a definition of equality--What a turn off.
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Painters and decorators who look like they've deliberately splashed 9 litres of Dulex over themselves and their clothes.
Yeah you're hard mate walking down the shops looking like that. We get it. You're a painter and decorater. |
Waking up to the outcome of somebody keying my car. Lowlife ****. Might be time to take the palace stickers out my window.
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My car got keyed by Wolves supporters a few years ago - and I didn't even have stickers on it. It is really annoying. |
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Barking dogs.
Or more their selfish dickhead owners |
Eateries that don't butter bread for a sandwich. WTF is that all about?
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Eateries - usually of the pretentious gastro variety - that don't use plates. Bits of wood, small silver buckets, slate kitchen floor tiles and flower pots are NOT suitable for serving food on/in.
If said eateries think they're being hip and quirky by using unsuitable objects for functions they are clearly not designed for then they won't mind if I take a shit in their sink rather than using the toilet. Gastro wankers. |
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This. I have no desire to eat my food off B&Q offcuts. Humans managed to invent an improvement hundreds of years ago. It's called a plate. |
People that use the quote button to copy a 1000 word post and simply say something like "I agree" or "This" or "^^^^^". Especially when it happens 4 or 5 times.
It's an outrage, it makes my blood boil, I'm so angry I could........................... |
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One waitress was so fazed by this she had to go and speak to the manager "to see if it was allowed". Pretentious assholes, the lot of 'em. |
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Which raises another issue with plane farters: when on a plane with air vents and there's some smelly twat farting I obviously reach for the vent and put it full on. Thing is are you then identified by other travelers as the farter or the fartee? The fresh air is worth the risk of the former if you ask me. |
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Probably been done to death but waiters who always ask of everything is ok when I have a face full of food
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It annoys me alot that i ordered curry at 7pm and its still not ******* here!!!!!
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Maybe I was a bit grumpy, but if I wanted food served like that I've have paid 3 quid and gone to McDonalds |
Getting back onto farts, I'm convinced my mother is deliberately holding her farts in until she's just outside my bedroom door and letting rip; that, or she's dashing outside the living room once she can feel them coming.
What if I had a friend round FFS? |
That my new speakers still haven't been delivered.
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Getting these speakers I bought in the pub to work without instructions.
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my speakers have been delivered :)
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Pubs, restaurants, take aways, bistros, cafes etc. being described as f****** eateries.
WTF is an eaterie?:grrr: |
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Being asked for upwards of £2 for a cup of hot water and a teabag. Go fck yourselves, I'll pass on that. |
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Today it is:
Joggers with dogs on a leash/lead. Joggers pushing pushchairs. (Both of these are relevant to riding a bike on a bike path that is shared with joggers... the optimum word being "shared"). Being 59 and trying to do manual labour! |
Oh - and overtaking a running club of about 50 people on a bike path when heading straight for you is a peloton from The Tour De France!
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Something always happening to prevent you getting a full nights sleep. Then treading in the untrainable dogs piss again when you go down to see wtf it is. grrr - oh you shithead :(
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The slow and gradual flaccidity associated with ageing.
Noticing gorgeous 20 something blondes who happen to look you in the eye. Then seeing one's reflection in a window to shatter the idea that they were thinking anything other than 'he's gotta be around 50. yuck!' |
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I think there seems to be some confusion around seats and lids here
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Pitta bread steam burns.
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Starbucks - Jesus what a rip off and they pay **** all tax
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People that wear sunglasses indoors.
People that wear sunglasses when it's not sunny. |
When you go to withdraw cash from a cashpoint machine and you see what appears to be saliva residue on the screen. Why would someone want to spit on a cashpoint? Odd.
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This sums up the complete naffness of Starbucks |
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Estate agents
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People who do not cross off the clues in a crossword once they have got the answer.
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The new trend to use the word snug to describe small rooms on TV property programmes
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The same with football managers and pundits and their over use of the phrase "football club" |
Just watching Paris-Nice cycling. Thierry Voeckler constantly sticking his tongue out and hamming it up to the cameras as yet another breakaway by his is slowly reeled in is annoying to watch. Warming up the act nicely for the TdF.
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Tw&ts who run in the office when they are late for a meeting or something.
You're not a doctor saving lives or anything like that....You're a self absorbed tw&t in the IT department. ITS NOT THAT IMPORTANT :veryangry:grrr: |
******* idiots that walk down crowded train platforms (or streets) reading a ******* book.
People, mainly but not exclusively women, who are unable to walk properly at the same time as talking on their mobile phone. |
Women with big arses. Take up almost as much room on planes, trains etc as fat people. Even worse when they think they are attractive.
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While I was away travelling I'd forgotten just how annoying it is to have people in streets or on public transport who play their mobiles etc out loud as for some reason they believe headphones haven't been invented yet and that they are a superior being who can impose what they want to do on everyone else. Experienced that so little abroad I can only assume that elsewhere in the world people are more conscious of other people.
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People who bad mouth Nandos without ever going there.
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People who feel a kind of tribal loyalty to a restaurant chain.
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