A slider is a small burger

I thought a slider was the result of eating a cheap, small burger.

??? Pic please

People who call burgers sliders. :)

This is becoming a bit of a slippery slope, but surely a slider is someone or something that slides.

Weren’t they called mules before they became sliders ?

Grandpas who cant keep up with the times

Tasseled loafer wearers...

Are women allowed to wear them to drive?

Seems they are allowed to wear them to work when in most cases men can't (not that I would ever have dreamt of wearing them to work).

Usually coming in a set of 3 or 4 so you end up eating the same amount of food as one big burger.... well here anyway.

Sliders? I think you mean Slaaaiiders. That's the correct pronunciation.

Anyone who calls flip flops "thongs" is an idiot.

oh and another thing that annoys me :

Hotel Fking Trivago.

Can you admit it's a new term then for Grandpa?

No idea how old it is, only heard it myself the other year :supergrin::supergrin:

No they’re not

Is correct

Since when, 2017?

Oi!!

Christmas cards appearing already.

My fat slob if a brother in law. His wife has gone back to America for a few weeks to see her family, so my wife invited him for dinner. Firstly he has the table manners of a pig and secondly he eats loads then complains of feeling sick because he has eaten too much.

I’ve no idea

Solution - make that his last invite

Americans.

Undisclosed transfer fees

My brain...for thinking of Nazi’s every time I hear a German speak.

Was just at an adventure playground on a kind of castle maze thing, and me and my 4yr old got in the way of a German lady behind us, who was playing some kind of chasing game with her 4 children. I apologised for slowing her down and she said, ‘Don’t vorry...I vill catch zem!’

I froze for a moment. Bloody indoctrinating war films.

This is all down to me, so I am mainly annoyed at myself, and I'm far too timid when it comes to stuff like the following...

We are ordering a new front door, and went to one of only 2 places in the area that specialize in Doors and Windows. A representative came out and convinced us the way to go is a fiberglass door, which was not my original thought. But the maintenance and warping issues sold me (especially as it is the problem with the old door). The guy gives us a manufacturers catalog and asked us to pick one out. After a few day we decide which one we want, and let them know.

They then send an installer out to take some measurements. While talking to him it turns out we have to provide our own door hardware (locks etc.) which is understandable, but the "experts" offered us no advise or direction on this. So off we trot to the big box hardware store and gets hardware. The installer also drops the point that the doors are not finished and require staining and gel coating. Again, we were not informed of this... the assumption was an oak grain door would look like it did in the catalog. Again, we now have to find a painter who specializes in painting fiberglass.

I think the thing that is annoying me is, I am basically being my own contractor here, and all the store has provided is a catalog and sent their installer (an independent company). The door manufacturer only sells through distributors so they have you by the balls. The lack of help and advise is bizarre. I could go on...

Makes you not want to do anything to your house... every time we have something done it ends up like this.

The Australian education system isn't the greatest.

To be fair, my American wife used to call flip flops, thongs. Thankfully she has got out of the habit now a thong implies something else.

It might be a 1970's thing to call them thongs.

My family call them slippers

In New Zealand they are called Jandles and I had to force my kids to use the correct flip flop terminology if they wanted a pair

Peasant scum walking around with a snake around their neck. No one thinks you're f*cking hard least of all the poor snake that is probably struggling to deal with subhuman scum body odour amongst other unwanted stimuli that it could do without.

Where was this? Has it become a thing like having Tyson on a lead ?

Oh wow, where's that?

Unbelievably in Chichester.

People that get taken for a ride.

Football season starting again.

I'm not sure I'm getting taken for a ride (the jury is out on that), what is annoying is bad communication and lack of professional advice and customer service by an established home town company that probably is dying on the vine for the reasons I give above.

There’s a geez who walks around Leeds with a lizard on his shoulder

Nuts

That would be our Gordon.

Mamadou Gekko
Mo Salamander

Etc etc and so on and so forth.

Did it eat the chip?

Judge me by my size do you ?

Second that

Especially when we haven't signed anyone decent !

Where is Nav these days?

It's used to keep the flies out of the way when he's beating his wife.

Being chippy on twatter.

I resemble that remark ...


(I just thought I’d trot an old boring one out to match the one of yours)

Universal Credit. I have just had my first statement through and they have given me the grand total of £1 to pay my rent. My job ended 30/6. I received my June pay (up to 30/6) on 19/7. This pay was for June NOT July and they have taken that off my Universal Credit payment for the period 1/7/19 - 1/8/19!!!! I hate this Government. IDS and Rudd especially. Can't see how I'll not be homeless. Life is such sh*t.

Surely a phone call can sort that out?

I tried and was told that is how they calculate Universal Credit.

Our shit transfer dealings /policy

The tedious booing of Steve Smith when he got a 100

People who tap their feet to music.

I used to love to tap dance, but fell in the sink.

southern rail staff having a chat at london bridge station and blocking half the turnstiles

Having to park 300 yds from my place because of gits who don't live any where near. Then when I walk back one of them has pissed off and left a space. Caaaarnts

Rubbish joke. Repped.:D

Saps that are happy to sit behind slow moving tractors, forcing you to overtake double bubble with a limited van. The pulse raises once you've missed at least two opportunities because the dick in front has decided he's not going to bother and continue to pick his nose or slurp his coffee.

I take it your van is white.

:)

I had three years of purgatory with them. I know it is tedious and frustrating, but you just have to keep on at them. These are precisely the problems they claim to have ironed out by now. Tell your rent people, they are normally sympathetic when it comes to UC problems. Tell UC you will take it to your MP. My MP is a very vocal critic of the system, but I never needed to go that far.

I had to ring them from hospital just before I was due to go for an assessment to say I couldn't attend because I would be on an operating table undergoing a quadruple by-pass and heart valve replacement. Three months later, I was eventually told my 'excuse' was valid and they would not sanction me and would take no further action.

They did sort most of it out after a few months, but they never EVER paid my correct rent. I had to make up the difference when they agreed to pay an unfit for work allowance. For some reason, they seem to think rent claims are some sort of a scam.

When I finally retired and told them I had my pension so they could stick their UC where the sun didn't shine, they said they were still going to pay it because they hadn't been informed. I said I was informing them. They said that doesn't count, they had to be informed officially. You couldn't make it up.

A crap system, devised by arseholes and administered by ill-trained idiots who are 'only obeying orders'. IDS certainly has a lot to answer for.

Keep on at them, and DLTBGYD.(Don't let the bastards grind you down). Good Luck!

Sort of, but i'm no DPD driver. The driving described was more about the tit content in sitting behind a tractor for at least three miles basically ignoring gaps to bother overtaking and force people to go past him, as well at the tractor trailer. Dangerous really and no real need for it......set me right off it did.

Gambling adverts that feature the little message: "When the fun stops, stop."

There's no fun. You're going to lose and you may as well rip up your cash and flush it down the toilet.

Better still, give it away to some poor unfortunate that really needs it rather than making the Coates family and their ilk even richer.

Fast and Furious Whatever - Another Rehash.

:S::S::S::S:

I think I've done this one before (this thread is getting so old it it repeating itself... well at least I am on both counts!).

Calling a contractor (in this case a painter) and having to leave a message, which is fair enough, but then they never call you back. This sets the relationship off on the wrong foot from the start, and does not instill any confidence in their work ethic. Don't they get this, or are they so busy they just don't need the work? If not, at least have the courtesy to still call back and say, "I'm fully booked", so I can move on to the next rocket scientist posing as a painter and decorator!

It's why I always see Eddie Howe as the 2nd Lieutenant in a castle somewhere. And then Clint Eastwood chucks a grenade back

:D

Attachment 52673

Vegans who get really edgy around pets. Make your fvcking mind up

:D

Two adult vegans who got arsey with my 14 year old neice who said she loved animals but liked eating meat as well.

Repped. :D

The guy who cleans his van with a pressure washer at 7:30am on a Saturday

The Muller Light yoghurt recipe change.

They say it's better and creamier but it's just thicker and I don't like that.

Palace leaving it late in the transfer window

It's yet another one of your hyacinth-bouquet, self-improvement, home-improvement, social-striving, getting-on, social-climbing, keeping-up-with-the-Jonses 'annoyances' so, yes, you've probably posted it before.

I'm starting to think you might be Steve Parish.

Going out for a rare lads night out last night and being sick twice this morning. I only had 8 pints as well and a black sambucca so hardly excessive in comparison to years gone by.

Ponce.

Brighty told me to tell you, "Go do one!"

Posts like this

Yup. I’m ashamed of myself.

I was going to let this go, but what the hey I'll take the bait...

5 out of 10... lose points for over use of the hyphens and misspelling of Hyacinth Bucket.

The adverse of all you post is what? Strive for the status quo, let your home evolve into a slum, become a hermit, be down trodden by your peers, become the black sheep of you neighborhood?

If you're happy with that... I'm happy for you. Seems you are setting your life expectations pretty low.

Then again you support Palace, so I guess that is a given! ;)

£5 minimum spend for card transactions. Before contactless cards came in I could see the logic but given many people, including me, are now completely cashless it just seems like a way of fleecing people out of money.

They're in place because the card companies charge the shop you're using a hefty commission.

And twits wanna go "cashless"

The endless threads on the Transfer Forum, many overlapping

My missus just phoned me "How much shall we put in Nicolas' wedding card?"

"nothing" I said

"we can't do that?"

"its cost me £178 in flights, 4 days lost wages come to £840, hotel another £180, new outfit £unknown Hairdresser £ unknown.

They can get to ****.

Oh and my brothers wedding is a week later, priority goes to that.

My annual moan. F kin Christmas films on in August. :wallbash:

'Curated by'. F**k off twats.

Jakarta and the rest of West Java having no electricity for 7 hours today. 50 million people affected. 7 gas turbines tripped at a power plant in East Java. Took them ages to switch them all back on. In fact one is still out.

The BBC hates Indonesia as much as they hate Palace, in their not-so-factual reporting.

Their report said "Traffic lights switched off in some areas of Jakarta, worsening congestion in a city notorious for traffic."

No it didn't. It's Sunday, less traffic and ALL the traffic lights were out so traffic ran smoother than normal. Took me 10 minutes to do a trip that normally takes 30.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-49227033

Twits? Change the vowel in twits.

Twots who don’t pick up their dog’s mess. They bag it up and then leave it by the roadside.

And no, they don’t pick it up later on their return. It’s still there days after.

They go through the effort of bagging it up, but then can’t be arsed to put it in a dog shit bin?

Or they reach over the garden wall and put it in my bins, the wankers.

People who click their fingers while dancing

'Doubling down'. F**k. Right. Off.

State governors inevitably banging on about God during a mass shooting press conference. Every f*cking time.

You dance?


People who dance. :D