That's class mates for you Dan

Whoooossshhhh!!!

Cancer Research constantly badgered my pensioner mother to increase her donation, despite being asked and then told to stop by her, me and my sister. She had made a modest donation for years following the death of a friend. She now, reluctantly, no loner gives

The Scott Dann thread

Think I give a fvck, jog on:rolleyes:

^

Also the onset of hayfever.

Still Timbo.

Transfer threads in general during the transfer window. A lot of speculation based on lazy journalism with posters spiralling into meltdown over unsubstantiated twitter rumours and Chinese whispers from so-called 'ITK' sources, usually ending up with Parish being abused and accused of lacking ambition for not holding on to our best players.

Having to clean up after cooking. Sometimes I'm in the mood for an extravagant feast, but the thought of having to clean it up afterwards means I usually end up eating 2 minute noodles

Two tiny noodles after wanting a huge feast?

The use of the word Tech instead of technology

"A REAL woman has curves." Said the curvy girl

"A REAL man goes to the gym." Said the guy who goes to the gym

"A REAL Palace fan hates Dougie Freedman." Says the Palace fan who hates Freedman

Your appearance, lifestyle choices and opinions don't make you better or worse than anyone else. Stop acting as if your opinions are facts by rendering any other views as invalid.

I cancelled my membership with WWF as they were constantly asking me to increase my donation.

I'd tell them where to go. They get paid a fortune and it's all choreographed anyway. They're not fooling anyone.

Companies ringing me up regarding my debts or my current debt management plan.

Rather than just saying 'I haven't got any debts' I decided to ask a few questions this time. I was told that my telephone number came from a survey completed in the previous 12 months stating that I had debt problems. I told the caller that 1. I don't complete surveys and 2. I haven't got any debts.

When I again queried how they got my number the caller said 'from the survey, how else would we get your number'. I suggested that was boll***ks and that they probably just had a list of numbers and hoped they might strike lucky. The lady did say that she would remove my name.

The company is Revive Solutions UK Ltd.

Who do I complain to as I must have had at least 4 calls in the last week.

Grown men calling girls "fit"

Telephone Preference service, I think. Haven't used it myself but I think they can stop this crap.

Next time she calls tell her you're not wearing any pants and start breathing heavily.

Overly drunken idiots puking on my train carriage. I'm pissed but it's a Wednesday FFS (Murray).

Also ex's with emotional blackmail.

People who write stuff online that they would never in a million years say in public or publish it under their real name. I know that everyone who posts regulary on here (including myself) has probably done it on the BBS on a few occassions but I'm more thinking about the people who comment under news articles who probably do this multiple times daily. What is the point?

WWF UK’s total income rose seven per cent in 2014 financial year

WWF UK's total income for the year ending June 2014 rose to £62.2m, an increase of £3.8m, or 7 per cent, from the previous year.

A total of 19 people earned between £60,000 and £150,000, two more than 2013.

The highest earner, believed to be chief executive David Nussbaum, received £140,000 and £150,000, the same figure as he earned in 2013.

:lux:

I am registered but if you have replied to a survey or sign up to a website with your telephone number and opt to receive info from associated companies then it appears that you are back in play. I don't think it stops the Indians from calling.

...looking after a neighbours 3 year old for 5 hours, because they're out of options and desperate... Only to find that the child's father was in alone.

People who think its ok to have a good chat at the cinema. Shut the feck up

Football clubs (I'm looking at you, Arsenal and Chelsea) that hire flag wavers. What is the point? Just let fans bring their own for God's sake.

Some kind of manufactured attempt by plastic clubs to jump on the ultras bandwagon after the likes of Dortmund have shown them up in the Champions League

Everyone on buses. ***** the lot of them.

School kids that get on with their shit smelly fast food and leave it lying all over the place... the ones that get on one ******* stop because they're lazy and fat as **** to waddle 100 yards. How they also have no spacial awareness unless there is two seats free and cram the front of the bus so despite there bring room for a good couple of dozen people mean people can't get on.

Evertone seems to think buses are a free for all when they turn up and that it doesn't matter you have been waiting 20 minutes longer than them but push on anyway, usually stealing any remaining seats and making you stand up in the process.

Loud as **** tossers (usually school kids again) but also usually women, people on phones and groups of blokes of an age they should know so much better shouting loud enough to be heard at a heavy metal gig on a quiet bus.

Oh and those playing music loud off their phones and just as bad those who have headphones but have it so loud they might as well not have bothered! Probably the same people that need to shout at 100 decibels to each other as above.

:veryangry

End of rant.

If the Arsenal fans don't see the flags waving - how will they know when to celebrate a goal?

To$$ers

The train line app.

Lies! Expensive lies!

People who fill the sugar bowl up to overflowing so sugar goes everywhere.

The M25

Leaving the milk out......... Oh and Royal Blood.

When are people going to realise they are not that good? F**k off Radio 1.

With you on Royal Blood, radio 1's latest "oh look, we found a band" band. Bunch of wankers.

And they're weeds :hmph:

'Have you had anything from the minibar' ?

Well why are you asking me if you send someone up to check before i can pay my bill anyway ?

their one gimmick is making a bass guitar sound like a normal one. Wow.

Teenagers.

The cringeworthy Irn Bru ads.

Are they meant to be funny? Or are they cleverly self-deprecating in a way that goes way over my head?

I've now changed my mind. Come the revolution, it won't be Health & Safety first up against the wall - it will Advertising Agencies.

People who listen to Radio 1, who don't like Radio 1

Autoglass. When did they become so shit?

I used them years ago without problems but Bobsta has had a mare with them.

Day 1 - Chip in windscreen

Day 3 - Autoglass came to fix it. Turned it into a crack. 10 days until they could get him a new windscreen. 10 ******* days!

Day 10 - Autoglass call him with 1 hour left of the day for which the appointment was made and say they may not get to him. He needs the car so he re-schedules for the next day.

Books the day off after being promised that they would be with him between 9am and 11am.

Day 11 - 30 minutes before 11am he gets a call to say that they "can't find his windscreen". How the **** were they going to fit it the day before if they haven't even got it? He gets a bit stroppy (not stroppy enough, IMHO) and gets them to promise that they will be with him on Sunday between 9am and 1pm whilst he's at work.

10 minutes later the fitter turns up but without a windscreen. Gets on to his boss and arranges to have one delivered so starts work removing the windscreen.

1 hour later geezer turns up with the replacement windscreen. It's the wrong one.

Fitter puts old cracked windscreen back in but can't get the trim to go back on so now Bobsta has a cracked windscreen that isn't secured at the top nearly two weeks after sustaining a minor chip.

Autoglass now promise that they will fix it Sunday as promised earlier this morning.

Their adverts promise that they can fix chips before they turn into cracks - they can't. They state that it's free for people that are Fully Comp - it isn't, they charged £25 for the bodged repair.

In short they are ******* useless and I can only assume that it is the fact that they have cornered the market and don't really face much in the way of competition that has turned them into such a ******* useless organisation. :veryangry

So glad I don't watch live TV these days.

Advance train fares that give you 45-50 minutes to use the tube to get between mainline stations in London so that if your original train gets cancelled the ridiculous amount of time given means that despite the inconvenience you still don't have enough of a delay to hit them up for the 'Delay Repay' scheme.

For example yesterday I arrived at 16:15 at Peterborough station for the 16:25 to Kings X only to find that it had been cancelled with the next being at 16:50. Given the stress of the situation I had to go to the hotel bar opposite and console myself with a pint of cider and some sausage and mustard crisps safe in the knowledge that the delays would lead to my delay repay submission being upheld therefore covering the cost of my consolation and make a fiver out of it.

However, even with the 5 minute delay of the 16:50 I still arrived only 11 minutes later than the time set out on my ticket leaving me a fiver out of pocket. It's just not cricket

Never watch it, no idea what you are on about, so I had to google it. Still none the wiser.

My senses are assaulted while watching things like CBS Reality (for Star Trek and Judge Judy), and CBS Action (now that they are repeating Ultimate Force). Later evenings are for Mystery Diners and Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives on the Food Network.

BBC4 is excellent for late night/early morning TV. They should put a lot of it on earlier rather some of the shite they broadcast. Plus none of it has bloody adverts :lux:

Less so BBC3 (Don't Tell the Bride, Eastenders repeats, as if once is not enough, Boozed-up Morons and Russell Fcukin' Howard - what is it about so-called comedians called Russell?. The only worth-while thing is the occasional Top Gear repeat. Not surprised that dross is going. So I will now add BBC3 to the list of things that annoy me.

Such is the fate of only having Freeview.

So, is live tv worth it and where do I find it???

http://kodi.tv/download/

https://seo-michael.co.uk/how-to-ins...for-kodi-xbmc/

Good site for free music, films, football, etc as well.

Unless they can start coming up with ads like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZUG9qYTJMsI

Extremely busy supermarket, 2 self-service checkouts out of 4 working, mother decides it's a good time to make a game of it and let her 3 year old scan every ******* item in a trolley. Ooooh, who's a clever girl? You've been there 15 ******* minutes and your kid has either scanned things 3 times or not at all, the assistant is getting ****ed off with you calling her over every 30 seconds and now there's a massive queue of pissed off people who don't think your kid is cute and who want to put your ******* head through the scanner. BEEP that you ******.
I ******* hate you and I ******* hate your nauseating little shit of a child. Forgive me if I don't share your parental pride you oblivious ****.

When Mike Bushell appears on TV.
Such an annoying little cretin.

The whole situation with that Big Issue seller (Sharon?) at London Bridge.

Louis Walsh, C..T:veryangry

So much easier to put everyone and everything!

But I do accept that moaning can be so satisfying.

Litter. Just put it in a bin.

Don't get me started .... Saw someone getting into their car yesterday and before he got in he threw away some sort of packaging from a sandwich or something . JUST PUT IT IN YOUR CAR UNTIL YOU GET HOME !!! :veryangry

I can't understand that mentality....why do they think that their litter is someone else's responsibility to deal with?

A dog walker friend has seen people pull into a lay-by near her route, change a baby and leave the nappy beside the road. Nice.

Just makes you wonder what other "standards" they keep in their everyday lives ?

The commentator on this clip about Chile. Why is he calling them Chilay???

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/33278344

People that take selfies. Anyone taking a selfie should be beaten to death with their own selfie stick.

I hope she choked on her Jelly Tots.

She has started to post more upbeat messages now though.

Groups of people who insist on walking 3 or 4 abreast on down the pavement. Worse still when they all link arms. Always completely oblivious to those trying to overtake.

I'm fairly sure I'm the only person in London that has anywhere to go and an idea of how to get there. Even walking across London Bridge to the station, there is literally no one in a hurry or indeed with any sense of urgency whatsoever. Does the entire population bar me manage to plan so fastidiously as to their train times that they're able to amble along without a care in the world and make their train with time to spare?

Real Londoners walk fast, they walk through tourists photos during rush hour. Where are they all?

Stuck at a Tesco petrol station forecourt waiting for a pump to free up. Man in white van using pump where I have parked up behind decides to walk off, get some tissue and start meticulously wiping some diesel spillage by his fuel flap. Wipes and wipes and wipes, then goes over to an older lady alongside, walks off and comes back with tissue and points to her fuel spillage, too. Now leaves perfectly safe and speedy pay at pump option and buggers off to join back of very long queue. Other pumps becoming free but taken by cars after me. Reaching the point of red mist, shout something disgusting based around Tesco being an effing s***hole and drive to Asda where I find they've ran out of diesel!!

[emoji112]

I always forget when I have Mrs Statto with me that she's not as adept as me at spotting & exploiting gaps & invariably turn round to discover she's 4 or 5 people behind me on the escalator

You need a lead!

Someone has to tell old women that the perfect pack of bacon simply doesn't exist, and you're as well picking up the first pack in the pile rather than sifting through every single one

Is she the one who has that board with a very similar message on it every day?

I know that it is just a sign of getting old but I really enjoy this thread.

Flies. Open a window because of the effing heat and within 10 secs there's a little git buzzing around. I've then got to get out of my chair again to get the electric tennis bat fly killer and when I come back he's gone.

In line with Wimbledon being on right now, TV tennis commentators. They have no right to exist, I turned the channel on to watch tennis, not listen to stories about the players' personal lives.

These ****ers always on in between programmes on Sky!... Hate the bald twat...

I love my tennis zappy bat thing.. :p

Students.
They (he :veryangry) comes home from Uni, the food bills sky-rocket, the washing machine doesn't stop, the car suddenly has a couple more dings, despite the washing machine going 24/7 there's dirty clothes lying all over the fecking place, my life-blood espresso coffee machine breaks when he's using it (camel/straw) etc etc

At least wait for him to finish uni.You know, when he moves back in full time:D

Tesco 'Luxury' Toilet Paper. It's not. It's not even Andrex Classic quality. It's a hybrid of the greaseproof paper you used to get in infants. Disappointed to find there are 12 rolls to be got rid of.

The wife for buying Tesco 'Luxury' Toilet paper.

Ed Sheeren - whiney and ginger not a good combo. Years ago we had rock pop stars that looked the part. Ed looks like a nerd (ok buddy holly did but he could sing) and Ed should be in a library.

One where they rigidly enforce the silence rule would be good

Andy Murray's mum. F*ck OFF.

Andy Murray. F*ck off as well.

Andy Murray's missus. Show us yer minge.

:D:D

Is that Murray on a good hair day?

Looks more like a raving noncecase on a pre pubescent Bay City Roller fan enthusiast day to me.

Iceland Petal Soft. 4 rolls for £1. Good stuff :p

Popped into TESCO today and I thought of this thread when the lady in front started fishing about in her purse before handing over small, crumpled vouchers.
The cashier had to then flatten them out, squint at the tiny writing before attempting to key the codes in, one by one.
Some weren't valid.....FFS at least check your vouchers are current, the rest of us have better things to do than watch this going on.
Her bill was £78 and she got about 25p off. She probably did that by buying something she didn't really want anyway!

Moles of the burrowing kind. I'm no posh garden freak but those little bastards demolish your garden within minutes......you little ****** I now have three traps with your name on.

The cabaye thread

Philby?

Eh ?? You've lost me.

Burgess?

McClean?

The new bbc news app. Old one much better with more info

Updates to apps/software that claim to improve functionality but instead ruin what ever the app/software originally did

mobile phone updates...you get used to what you have, then it's all over the place!

People who can't pronounce what this is '*'

It's a ruddy asterisk, OK?

as-ter-isk.

Not an aksteriks, or a astrix, or anything else. It's not difficult.

People that have whistles in their nose.
I hate that insanely.

I once (only once) held up a supermarket queue. I'd mistakenly picked up a tin of tomatoes ripped out of a multi-pack, so it didn't have a barcode. The cashier didn't know what to do and neither did I, but this bloke behind me grew so frustrated with the hold-up he took my can of tomatoes out of the cashier's hand, stormed off to the tin of tomatoes section and eventually came back with one that did have a barcode. Only when I got home did I realise it was a can of tomatoes alright, but mixed with f****** garlic. How disgusting. It literally ruined my weekend I was so angry.

http://i.imgur.com/R3Cu9Qfl.jpg?1

Whichever bastards who steal Cabaye from us with a late bid.

Sky Sports News inability to talk about the Ashes without mentioning ******* sledging.

Now that is just ridiculous. There's not likely to be snow in this heat after all.

Lickspittle politicians and civil servants who name or rename things after the queen. Queen Elizabeth Park? **** off, it's the Olympic Park. What the **** has she got to do with it? Queen Elizabeth II Bridge? Why? I doubt the miserable old ******* trout has ever been stuck for 2 hours queueing to get on the ******* thing. And what was wrong with 'Dartford Crossing'? It says where it is and what it does.
New aircraft carrier? We need a name... hmmm, a nation with centuries of maritime history... let's call it... HMS Queen ******* Elizabeth II.
Use your ******* imaginations you toadying *****.

:)

'fecking expensive borrowed plane-ship'

:)

Or at least balance it out and call bad things after her, like the Queen Elizabeth II split bellenditis, or the Queen Elizabeth II reverse wheelbarrow bumsplodge