Why do people feel the need to buy gigantic boxes of popcorn at rip off prices when going to the cinema? And if they have to, they better not sit near me

Cos it's tasty af m8

In fairness I make sure I'm very quiet when I eat it. Noisy twats at the cinema do my head in

It ******* stinks. Cinema's smell rancid.

Because 'gigantic' is only 50p more than 'fvcking enormous' and they want to encourage the 'shared experience'?

How over rated is popcorn.

It's the Emile Heskey of snack food

Any foodstuffs I eat in the cinema is bought outside anyway, its cheaper!

People who use the word 'so' in the correct context and think otherwise.

Scum.

So thats a no then?

Most popcorn unless it's Butterkist toffee or something tastes like eating polystyrene.

Yes, I bring in curry and 8 cans of Guinness.

Butterkist, Butterkist rah rah rah.

To be washed down with a Ki-ora, of course. (I'll be your dawg.)

Petrol prices still at £1.05 with oil today at 2004 values, when it was £0.82p a litre

I'm with you on this. Salted popcorn anyway.

I like salt and I like popcorn...but I f^cking hate salted popcorn. And peanut M&M's!

96p here

no, it's the smell of the lard-arse inducing putrid chemical hotchpotch of caramelized corn syrup and fat that they cover the tasteless polystyrene balls with.

Ah, you see, when prices go it's because of the wholesale market cost rising so prices will only come down when wholesale....wait....shit.... Look at that over there!

*runs away*

MightyDeals.co.uk Shocking service never ever ever ever ever deal with them.

January Transfer Windows.

Chelsea Fans - Especially the one who sits behind me at work.

People constantly telling you how cold it is at the moment.

People with 'distinctive' ringtones who then leave their mobile on their desk when they get up to do fvck knows what

Its a bit chilly Willy out there!

Identity
Is the crisis
Can't you see
Identity identity

http://www.yuexingtoys.com.hk/images/soccer_balls.jpg

then don't visit the cinema in Streatham. Its mental.

http://eil.com/images/main/X-Ray+Spe...ty+445280b.jpg

Sorry Chocks... I must spread

me too http://www.thinkgeek.com/images/prod...oom/fundue.jpg

I am waiting for a train to be announced at a London terminus along with a crowd of other people. It is obvious that the train is going to be packed.

So why is it that when the train is announced the first people onto the train do not sit next to the windows? Why do they sit on the aisle seat or in the middle seat? And if the first set of people sit on the window seat why do the second set of people sit in the aisle seat and not in the middle seat?

Why on earth not fill the train up properly rather than force people to bang knees with you as they squeeze past?

Oh, and when you are in the aisle seat don't expect the person in the window seat to offer their seat to the obviously pregnant woman who is standing up.

I joined a train with my wife when she was heavily pregnant and not one person offered to give up their seat. I had to loudly ask the carriage in general if someone would be man enough to offer their seat to a pregnant woman. Not one person moved.

Eventually, at the second time of asking, a woman stood up and my wife could sit down.

C*nts.

Danny ******* Dyer

This is my biggest ******* hate. I remember getting pissed off once when an old lady got on the bus and this kid that looked about 18 just sat there at the front. Told him to get up and he just sat there and refused :veryangry

The metric system.

:(

Just can't fathom that. State of the nation.

Is that for real? No c*nt in the carriage would stand up for your wife? I would hope that was a one off and in another carriage your wife would be given a seat without asking. What sort of people were in that carriage?

Just been told it was a train in Uganda. No wonder.

Just hope he breaks his leg and no-one gives him a seat when he is on crutches.

Clackers

Yep.

The whole world is stark raving clackers.

Waiting for someone to take a photo and they take friggin ages to get that award winning shot

I've literally had to turn the volume of the tele because if these ******* things. Leicester may have a good team but they are a joke.

Nervous coughing

A-hem.

Being told the parcel will be here on Friday any time between 8-6, then getting a call sat morning apologising for my parcel not turning up, but it will be here Monday morning... you can guess the rest.
I've been told it'll be here tomorrow.

Leicester fans. At the moment, their moaning when you dare to say they probably won't win the title or (gasp) you don't really want them to get top 4 is annoying. Desperate to be liked.

The family of owls that have moved into the woods behind the house. Hooting all bleeding night. Feck off you bastards :grrr:

get Blind round

He's a good mod, but I'm not sure they'll listen to him tbh.

Have found some earplugs to drown them out. Probably wont hear the alarm now.

So true, this bloke's stealing a living, one decent film, I reckon The Business

I see your gentle hooting of owls, and raise it to the raucous din made by the 50 or so sulphur crested cockatoos that live in the large trees near us.

Even one of them makes an unbearably loud noise, but when they all take flight and join in with their "we're going to wake all you ******* up" cacophony at 4.30am, no-one - anywhere - is likely to sleep through it.

FWIW we get owls (and tawny frog mouths) around our place too. Trust me, the hooting is nothing in comparison to the feckin' cockatoos!

Set your alarm for 4:15am, let off a round from your double-barrelled shotgun & go back to bed. You'll be asleep by 4:30am. Problem solved.

I'm annoyed by people who choose to live in the countryside getting annoyed with the sounds of the countryside.

Go live in a city and contend with the police sirens, car alarms and drunken feckwits having a night on the town.

I live in a city. Well there's some debate over that, but its either a city or a town. Complete with the other noises you mention as well. Plus owls, although they seem to have shut up/flown away/been shot now.

That does sound far worse to be fair JJ. On the plus side you get to live in Sydney though :)

I don't live in the countryside, but I still get the cockatoos!

Yeah in a cell :) You might get away with that in Thailand ;) I feel sorry for people who have to live near seagulls though. They are proper scum.

Move to England.

No cockatoos but thousands of fecking parakeets around here in leafy Surrey.

Where did these green feckers come from and why don't they just go back?

They should all be freezing to death right now but they don't.

The best restaurant thread on here:

http://www.cpfc.org/forums/showthrea...69761&page=101

I'm starting to get the Nigels thing. :(

People who live in leafy surrey and moan about green parakeets. Go live in a city and contend with police sirens, car alarms and drunken feckwits. And owls and seagulls.

Remember noticing them in West Wickham in the early 70's obviously have bred and become indifferent to the climate, Bit like the kangaroos in some french park

Touché. :D

When I lived in Brisbane we had a flock of rainbow lorikeets living in the tree in our garden. Possibly not quite as raucous as cockatoos, but bloody noisy at 4:30 nonetheless (particularly as you have to sleep with the window open if you don't want to drown in your own sweat by the morning!)

:D I got told off once for telling them to go to Donatellos or something in Brighton. I was soon informed that the thread was for upmarket eateries! I quickly left before I mentioned mcdonalds.

Try kookaburras now they are noisy feckers when there is a gang of them

'Could you reach out to the Bangalore team?'

No. I can't. It's too far. It's a feat beyond even Stretch Armstrong. I could phone them though which I'm guessing was what you meant but instead elected to cloud your speech in incoherent, pointless, grating and poncy office speak.

People with folding bikes on trains who can't be bothered to fold the bike up

Unicycles are the future of transport. You'll be able to ride through those train carriages without bothering other travellers. Apart from hitting the odd unfortunate person exiting the loo, but that's just collateral damage.

Marmite. Love the stuff, but why is it such a shit to spread?

stick the jar in the microwave for a few seconds.

I haven't got a microwave.

it's going to be shit to spread then.

HTH :p

Bowl of hot water for a couple of minutes then

Assuming you've got water and taps and shit

Scruffy tramp

Hairdryer treatment ?

He's bald.

Cold snap looks like it's ending

The first four words of your post were sufficient.

The Sky News reporter Alistair Bunkall. What a complete bell end c*nt.

I'd stop at the first word.

People who have a moan about something at palace then follow it up with '...but at least we've got airblades in the loo' or '...but at least parish is happy with the amount of Facebook likes' or '...but at least there are now gnomes in stock at the club shop' or some other stupid shit. Like they expect their particular issue to literally be the only thing that everyone in the club is focusing on.

deal with it

I spent the first 41 years of my life in leafy Surrey!

We've got roughly 400,000 rainbow lorikeets living in the same area as the feckin' cockatoos, and as you say they make a bloody racket too. We also have some - admittedly not quite as many - kookaburras. It only takes one of them to start up and off they all go.

that cacophony is one thing I don't miss of Sydney. We used to call it the Frenchs Forest Fanfare - always knew when you were back home!
We once had a pair of Kookaburras having a set to on the roof. Honestly thought they were going to come through it!

Henry Blofeld
The fuss about nonentities Willoughby and Schofield getting drunk

And schofield falling asleep using holly willoughby's bottom as a pillow.
Gayest thing I have ever seen...

I saw one total cockwomble the other day ask someone to move off their seat because he claimed it was a designated one for cyclists!

Any flamin' galahs?

I'm jealous

Cookie acceptance notices. Poke your c*nting cookies up your arsehole sideways just let me view what I clicked on.

unfortunately it's the law

EU no doubt?

Having man flu and getting no sympathy from the wife.

That fact that people will pay £220 for a pair of boots that are simply a pair of socks with some studs on.

http://www.adidas.co.uk/ace-16_-pure...50&cm_mmca1=UK

Life

Yes it give people choice, if they want their data collected where they previously had none.:hi:

I know what it's for but everyone still goes ahead anyway. It's a pain in the arse.

Knock-on effects from the Big Bang.

Knock on effects from last night's chilli noodles. Big Bang my arse.

Yes, but they don't make anything like the same noise.