JCB me thinks!

Definitely if you have the access. Even one of them little mini diggers. I'd probably crash that into the house though :)

Setting up your own model railway ?
;)

idiots walking in the street while staring at their bloody phones.

I'm just looking at the BB... Ouch, who put that lampost there?

No bloody way. I stare at enough ballast as it is :)

F*ckwits who stare at their phones on escalators, then stop dead as they get off at the top/bottom.

same goes for tourists (on their phones or not) in London

Is that Desso grass?

You my friend need a little ingenuity:

Part 1

Part 2

:)

Its amazingly wet grass, I had to stand on it to pull the weed control stuff up to the edge and it was proper squelchy. Never lived anywhere with clay soil before, its really shit isnt it.

Your mans really thought about his pea gravel options there hasn't he :)

Bogans

Especially the ones who walk in a diagonal line rather than a straight line. Takes them twice as long to get over , but the upside is it gives me more chance to clip them :D

Grown men who work in offices who use the toilet and are then unable or unwilling to use the toilet brush or perhaps give it another flush, and are content to leave the bowl looking like a 3 year old has been there.

Cyclists

Roaring down Cannon St at 8.15 in the morning and if one of the thousands of pedestrians steps into the road and dares to make them slowdown for even a second they either ring their pathetic little bells furiously or bellow 'get outta the way'

Just how self important have cyclists become?

So you're annoyed because you didn't look before crossing the road?

Scottish people who you do not know on a personal level but you have encountered saying the words 'see you later' instead of 'goodbye'

Ironic, given your handle.

Used to happen in my old office often. Thing is this should only ever happen if someone has been drinking the night before. Proper diet will mean you will never encounter such things.

Idiot parents who park on the zig zag lines of a zebra crossing outside a school.

:veryangry:veryangry:veryangry:veryangry:veryangry :veryangry

Then the driver and child suffer when there's an accident. If they get a ticket or a talking to by the school they give an outpouring of indignation. Should have their cars taken away for a month as punishment.:grrr:

:D

Swintons/Aviva.

Quite happy to have taken my money for the last 11 months so I can have car insurance, only to tell me, following a call yesterday to give me a renewal quote, that they were going to cancel my insurance with 7 days notice as they would not permit me to drive on a company insurance while in work. The knew all of this when I took out my policy. If I had made a claim in the last year chances are my claim would have been knocked back.

Out of the goodness of their heart until Feb 1st they will allow a third party claim from me (I have fully comp insurance) but refuse to commit this to writing.

I want all my premium money back. They are so far refusing.

Though out of the goodness of their hearts (again) they initially said they would waive the £25 cancellation fee and the other £20 odd I would owe on the policy. Have now shifted it to them giving me £50. Now have to get back the rest.

Bastards

Sky Sports News' High Priestess of Smug Natalie Sawyer always getting the cushy afternoon shift. All the others have to move around, what's so special about her? I bet they all fvcking HATE her and shit in her locker when she's not there, which is most of the time.

You want to cock her, dont you.

Or flick the 'Sawyer bean'?

No, no I would not.

I don't think.

The woman in front of me in the queue for the bus, who despite waiting for the bus to arrive and knowing the fare, decided to wait until she was at the driver to get her purse out and start rummaging around for change and holding everyone up.


Oh, and her stupidly long nails that meant she struggled to pick the coins from her purse

The Seven Seas TV advert. Possibly the most nauseating 2 minutes available. A woman who looks like a pepperami in a wig spouting 'age is just a number' , whilst believing a wet looking hipster colleague, who is young enough to be her grandson, is flirting with her. It makes me want to vomit....

Might have something to do with her being fit as **** and being the hottest chick in town. Except the blonde bird that was on tonight. And Hayley McQueen.

But she's still hot. And you would. Defo you would

Guessing right with 1-3 loss to Spurs on the crystal ball thread, but losing points by not naming any poxy Tottenham scorers. And not being given the benefit of the doubt, when it's kind of implied in any prediction of Tottenham scoring three, that at least one of them is going to be by Harry Kane FFS.

"of the seven that guessed the correct result (1-3) only one didn't predict Kane" - makes me look like a ******* moron!

Given the benfit of the doubt? :D

Do shut up. We spend long enough as it is on updating the table after each game without having to guess whether a poster has implied that someone is going to score or not.

Oh and you don't require any help in looking like a ******* moron.

Posted videos of pea gravel conveyors

My better half betting. Has a £100 bet with me she can go January without a drink. She lasted a week.
Got paid yesterday and goes into a right strop when I insist on my £100, even offered to drive her to the cash point.Feckin women:rolleyes:

When every player gets their surname spelt in full apart from 'Chungy', why?

His surname is Lee.

Punch, Wardie, the Hen, Damo, Cham, Gaylie, etc will disagree with that one. Even Pards says 'Gaylie is back in training'.:)

This.

Backache

I mean on the BBS very frequently a poster will state all surnames in full but then say Chungy. I find this annoying as why is he the only one, almost a contagious trait. It wouldnt be so bad if people laited other nicknames but just his.

Is it because of him being South Korean and people are not sure which is his surname, "Lee" or "Chung Yong" or "Chung", as the poster said its "Lee"

Natalie Sawyer = Yes

'the Hen' makes me want to scratch my eyes out

Palace fans that give opposition players absolute pelters for surrounding the ref after a foul, but are up out of their seats waving pretend yellow cards at him about a minute later when one of our players gets fouled.....

Driving fart bubble rental cars the when you put your foot down nothing happens except the engine goes "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee".

Also seeing the car in daylight for the first time and realizing it has some body damage... hoping there is no problem when I take it back.

Mrs KM works in admin at the local school. Every so often the Council rangers raid the place and book people for illegal parking. The parents then phone the school to complain that they have been booked.:confused:

:hi:

You're fecked.

I had a big row with Alamo regarding this.

Select your own car is fine but if you fail to spot the dent before it goes out then it's your problem.

I always have the full insurance package so ultimately it wasn't a problem for me but I bet they catch a few people.

Ummmm. Fingers crossed then. I'm hoping that Dumb and Dumber who were on the desk at Hertz won't give a shit when I take it back

Our new toilet's inability to deal with skidmarks.

I give you one job a day FFS

Worldy

Hammy

**** off

Cats (and dogs) treating the pea gravel like some kind of giant litter tray.

Free manure!

Try to poo at work. Nothing like getting paid to curl one out.

Perhaps some one has beaten me to It ?????...Gary ( The Wolf man) Money compare dot****ingcom. What advertising business presents this without understanding that It Is boring and probably alienating millions of people.

See post 7598.:D

Don't say you weren't warned.

You might not be used to this in America but its called a manual transmition car. The outer pedal isn't for resting your other foot on, it's the clutch, take it off to avoid further wees.

Now you know why the pile isn't getting smaller, despite your best attempts to shovel it away!

You need horse ***t to improve your garden borders, I think dog and cat crap has the opposite effect.


Oh, I do hope I haven't just given Elgin another idea!

I'm out of ideas mate, too fecked :) Shovelled about 7 tonne so far I reckon and covered the low half. Trying to estimate it is pretty tricky though, dont think I'll have enough to angle it too much. Luckilly it'll be covered with decking and fake grass so that should keep next doors cats from doing their business on it.

You do know you're not supposed to wash your pants in the toilet?

It's pretty much impossible to rent a manual transmission car here. Getting pretty hard in the UK too from my last 2 visits.

But yes, your point is taken. Mind you two hours in stop and go traffic is no fun with a stick.

The GPS on my running app not working

It irritates me that despite over 354,000 views, the word "see" hasn't been corrected to "saw" in the title of this thread.

Get a bike cheapskate....

Another mistake that is enshrined in BBS history. It needs to stay incorrect.

Agreed, but when correction come?

stay at home mums who say "I am more than a mum, I am cook, cleaner, taxi driver and shoulder to cry on". Ermmum I think you will find that is in the job spec of being a mum, you wouldn't get an accountant saying I am more than an accountant, I submit returns and accounts too.

Don Letts (shut the fvck up ay?)

?

His 6Music trailer gets right on my tits

Did you get lost?

People who assume the 'Great' in Great Britain refers to how marvellous we were back in the good old days of empire, slavery, kids up chimneys and when Johnny Foreigner took a damn good 6 of the best thrashing off us and knew his place.

Everywhere we gooooooooooooo
everywhere we goooooooooo
It's the <insert name of midlands team> boys making all the noise
everywhere we goooooooooooo

People who post this shit on Facearse. I don't care how far you cycled, where you cycled, how fast you were going or how long it took.
If there's a cliff on your smartphone map, do me a favour and cycle off it you f*ckers.

http://a2.mzstatic.com/eu/r30/Purple...en322x572.jpeg

The scottish weather forecast. Why not just say 'pure shite for the next 11 months' in september and have done with it.

I'm surprised you didn't place the full stop after the second word.

proper shit song, Spurs sing it as well

No, but it didn't track my distance which annoyed me as I now don't know how fast I ran

The scottish? :D

Nah most of them are sound I've found. They like it if you take the piss back :) The weather though is ridiculous. Today I can't get out of the estate because I stupidly thought that that would be the last of the winter snow last time. I could try putting on the snow chains I suppose.

Nice and sunny here.

Shitloads of snow here. On the plus side I can have a day off from the gravel.

The weather in Sydney lately.

Shoveling snow instead?

Anyway, its been days now, that gravel should be finished. Half a day at the most.

:D

It is nearly and I have been working all week as well as being taxi, cook and bottle washer. Hows the kodi working? Half a days work at the most ;)

Will David Cameron claim credit seeing as he was up your way on Thursday ?

I know high winds were forecast but where was the mention of snow?

Paul, I Have woken up to a fair sprinkling down here and now all of a sudden they are predicting it is going to get a lot worse over next day or so.

Same for you Paul? I had to cancel going to Dunkeld yesterday because of the high winds, now looks like I wont be able to go for a little while because of the ******* snow and icy roads.

Nick said its thawing in edinburgh, but its still mentally snowing here mate. Makes a change from constant rain though. Would imagine Dunkeld will be impossible for a day or two unless you get the train.

If I was simply going to Dunkeld itself then yes a possibility but am going to Corbenic a couple of miles from it.

On and off snow here. Am not looking forward to working this evening and driving around in it.

Me too. However that is in a train so I can have lots of fun doing running brake tests past stations (especially if palace get beaten).

Shame there is nobody there who could pick you up and drop you back after.

Jimmy Fallon.
Has there ever been a tonight show host that is more fake. Thinking every guest is his best mate, pathetically laughing at their inane wanky American humor. Seriously wish this bloke would ******* self combust on set. Hate, hate, hate this persistently irritating **** on TV.
Awwwww faaarrrkkk I can't stand this total ******* oxygen thief.

:D

Going into a packed cafe on your own, queuing for food, then seeing that the only free table has been taken by someone who is saving it for the person two or three people behind you in the queue

Selfish that's what I call it

Tessa Sanderson - so superior

Always sung at a ridiculously fast pace as well, like they've been snorting pro plus tablets beforehand.

People who play bagpipe music on the train.

it's been said before but chips served in buckets and/or baskets or whatever. Just give me a ******* plate and stop wasting my time.

Use your coat like the German towel cliche, then queue up?

Arranging a nice romantic evening at a special restaurant for a surprise & discovering she's taken her mobile along. She then spends ages taking selfies, sending the pics on Facebook & getting replies while I'm vainly trying to get her attention. Complete waste of time & effort!

I guess the lesson is that you shouldn't arrange a romantic date with a prostitute - just get down to business and move on. :p

Take your own selfie, post it on Facebook yourself and mail her saying 'hello, would you like to chat with the person sitting opposite you?', and then add a few smiley emoticons to reduce the chance of an argument ensuing.

If she doesn't take this unsubtle hint and alter her mobile obsession, try suggesting you both put away the mobiles over dinner (even if you do already, it sounds nicer if you pretend you're making a gesture too).

Just the latest dull song that everyone has decided to sing.

Although we kind of started it with the See Pee Eff See song.