Rubbish tin openers.
We bought an excellent example about 10 years ago which lasted 6 years.
Since it died we've had 5 or 6 and none of them have lasted longer than 5 months.
Utter crap.
Can anyone recommend a brand?

Good Grips

Honestly can't remember the last time I used a tin opener mind. Nearly all tins are pull ring nowadays

Living with the trials & frustrations of one of your kids trying to learn how to whistle. Trying to remain patient, trying not to laugh, dealing with the frustrations & rage as they attempt to master the skill.

Children whistling.

Joanna Lumley getting a BAFTA for longevity. Don't dislike her,but she's an average actress,Ab Fab was awful,New Avengers mediocre. Her best moment was the cameo in Wolf Of Wall Street.

Similar to them doing anything, to be fair.

Has he finished lobbing half filled water bottles up in the air then?

Or fidget spinning?

Or dabbing?

Little bastards.

Have you ever noticed that people without earlobes can't whistle? They're not human.

Fox's howling outside the house,winding the dog up.Been at it since 03.30 and now that's me up.Fecking bastards :wallbash:

Joanna Lumley. Detestable woman.

Spanish people (particularly Catalans in Barcelona), complaining about tourists.

Actually... Catalans. I've grown very anti Catalan over the years I much prefer the Spanish.

David Hasselhoff. What a wanker

F-hoff

Gurkha mattress.

Baby showers? How are they now a thing? Because prospective / new parents need more attention don't they?

No, because retailers need to make money.

Bastards on mopeds getting away with murder because the libartards wont let the police chase them, ,poor little scum thief might scratch his knee

Having the second appointment of the day at 8.15am, but he's still running 35 minutes late (and counting.)

Didnt stop Tom Hardy the other week.

Songs where the singer breaks off the singing malarky and starts talking the lyrics or adding 'heartfelt' phrases like 'Im a lover not a fighter'.

the Barmy Army. Really wacky lads

Things that annoy you
 

Waiting in a doctors waiting room. My appointment was 11am... at 1117... a guy comes out of the surgery... chats to receptionist for 8 mins about if they should replace the staff filter coffee machine with a machine that takes capsules/pods. After his 8 minute chat.. he calls out my name.
If you're running late... save your coffee machine chat for another time.

Wild animals who have the whole of the Surrey countryside to take a dump, but insist on using the shingle next to my decking.

FIXED.

He probably recognised you from the platform :)

People wearing baseball caps whilst working out in the gym......why?

1 Underpowered container artics that slow to 20 mph when they come to a 1 in 20 gradient.
2 Rust bucket horse boxes towed by rust bucket Land Rovers that can't do more than 20 mph anyway.

Bad hair day.

Hope you're not typing this while driving.

EFA. In particular people that wear them back to front.

Children with umbrellas.

Alcopops?

How a about people that wear them, back to front, in the gym?

Slapheads

People who spend their time in gyms.

People who wear any type of hat indoors..No excuse for that unless the roof leaks.

The 'Kermode and Mayo's Film Review' podcast from 5 Live.

A few years back it used to be great. The radio show itself was only an hour long so it was a nice, stripped down film review fronted by two amiable types.

Then the radio show became two hours long and so did the podcast. Then they started added about 20 minutes to the start and 10 to the end of un-broadcasted material.

Which would be fine if it was just a film review, but no.

Now, the podcast starts with Mayo doing a Milky Milky voice. You then get 20 minutes of drivel powered by the audience's ability to use social media. You get to hear all about the audience's brilliant academic careers, their wonderful families, the fantastic places around the globe that they live in, their tremendous jobs. How the podcast has saved them from certain death. Sometimes they might even mention a film in passing, if you're lucky.

Then there's the so-called comedy. I used to smile as they occasionally said 'Hello to Jason Isaacs' or mentioned wittertainment. Now it's all this cods about the church and which part of the church the audience is, I don't know, buried in, based on their fantastic jobs which they have to tell you is fantastic. Together with what is the type of in-jokes normally chortled at by the middle class that think that things like Mornington Crescent is somehow the comedy equivalent of Brecht.

So, I now play 'guess where Mayo says 'here's this week's top ten''. Last week it was around 23 minutes into the podcast. This is where the film reviews actually start.

Trouble is, when they get to a quick review of the number one film the next part is a sycophantic interview with some actor or director plugging their latest film that Kermode will be sniffy about. So there's another bit of scrubbing forward.

Then, at the end, after the radio show ends, there's more drivel.

This used to be a 'must listen to' podcast but I'd get annoyed when they took their many holidays. Now, I actually look forward to their holidays because their replacements, often some combination of Edith Bowman, Robbie Colin, that erudite Indian actor who's name temporarily escapes me and a Floyd or a Boyd, return to a stripped down no nonsense film review podcast.

I persevere because for years Kermode has been my touch stone for finding high quality, obscure films. However, I would appreciate if somebody could recommend a high quality alternative podcast to films showing in British cinema.

Agree utterly pretentious and self indulgent
What also annoys is ever time at the station I have to hear some patronsising voice saying see it say it sorted shut the f up

^good posts, I tend to agree. I like them both, but feel it has lost focus too much. I like the top 10 and the second half where Mark reviews, but they could do with a producer that reigns them in a bit. It's a shame as Mark is so knowledgeable and speaks so eloquently, i wish they'd just let him talk more about film.

I'm annoyed that R5L is only on AM or DAB.
Why hasn't it ever made it on to FM?
Considering the crap that is available in stereo FM why not the football.

Make ya minds up.

The Pope & women at a wedding are the only people permitted to wear a hat indoors. Everyone else doing so should be killed.

By a kid with an umbrella.

Washing up liquid makers.
What is it with them? Are they completely isolated from the rest of the packaged liquid soap industry? Getting the last bit out of the bottle (without adding some water and thus reducing the quality of the soap sud making ability) is a balancing act of high-wire-like skill viz a viz turning the bottle over to drain the last drop to the dispensing aperture.
Come on guys, move with the times, either change the method of dispensing or put your product in a bottle with a flat-topped top that allows easy and unskilled upsidedowning.

They're bald?

For some reason I find people who wear tie pins extremely irksome. It seems to be becoming more popular with the younger aspiring 'professional' (think estate agents, people who work in recruitment etc)

I wear one to stop my tie flopping in to my soup

Perhaps I should also put one on my willy



Ps I don't really wear one

I would like to take my daughters to go and see Annie the musical, the stall seat tickets are £110 each.

The continued decline of the quiz machine in pubs.

It's a joke mate

I was looking to take me, the wife and 2 kids to London for the day on the train and go and see Annie over Easter

Train - £200
Tickets for show - £300 minimum
Food etc - £150

Minimum for a day out £650.

We went to Center Parcs for the weekend for £480 so plus food and entertainment for 4 days, it was about the same

It is pricey, but musicals do cost a heck of a lot to stage.

Not only a large cast of on-stage performers, but also a live orchestra, large venue to hire, costume people, big crew of stage hands etc etc.

You were planning to see something akin to an opera in terms of staging, and tickets for quality operas can range much higher than that.

Yoad, of course I understand that, and if it was just the wife and me no problem but there is no discount for children and £110 for a stall seat is high, normally they are between £60 and £80 max.

Good shout. Spent many a happy evening in the pub playing Who Wants To Be A Millionaire and Hangman. Maybe the speed with which people can google these days means they're constantly paying out.

Because they are look-at-me tw@ts?

Er..don't you generally add it to water to make suds? Anyway, this is as nothing compared to getting at the sizeable amount of mayo that is impossible to retrieve from a squeezy bottle of the stuff.

Almost as bad as the full kit wanker is saw. In fact as it was Man Utd gear he's effectively a double wanker (or Wanker²). Definitely worth a should barge.

A mate and I once won £16 on Hangman where it gave us 'complete phrase' bonus three times in a row. Even approximately 17 years later it still seems too beautiful to have been true. I think we wasted it all on the same machine over next 90 minutes but **** me what a rush.

:D

The beauty of the quizzer is that a group of you can get involved, and it never costs that much as opposed to fruit machines which are just rubbish.

Used to love a game of Cluedo, the joy of getting the 3 green ticks and solving it.

The sound of all those pound coins rattling into the tray and everyone in the pub looking over to see who had won :love:

Used to often go to The Woodman in South Croydon with just a couple of quid and then the Give Us A Break machine would pay for beers and a kebab on the way home, Good days.

Is the correct answer.

At least with mayo bottle it's as easy as 1-2-3 to get gravity involved. Nice flat top.

My wife who, after us both being in the house for the previous 4 hours, decides that the best time to have an in depth conversation about various important things is just as I am leaving for work.

Agreed. (Neither Estate Agents or people who work in recruitment are 'professional', they just wear suits / dress up to go to work.)

Is there another solution to stop a tie blowing around and slapping you in the face etc. when outside?

At school, people used to drop 2ps into the lining of their ties, which seemed like a great use of basic counter-weights for flappage avoidance. However in practical sense it was predominantly used as a makeshift cosh.

What with all the skyscrapers and stuff these days, walking through the city is like stepping into an air tunnel at times. I almost set myself alight once when my tie went mental and flapped straight into my lit cigarette. The sheer terror of it!

I haven't got a tie pin, but i don't object to a simple, functional one and they don't make me angry. Estate agents and recruitment consultants, yes they do make me angry but not for their ties, mainly for their complete lack of skill, lack of common sense and lack of intelligence.

The slide clip ones, the small badge types ones or those peculiar spear things that go through the collar?

Where are you on lapel badges?

That reminds me of the 2nd greatest scene in cinematic history (not including The Quiet Man) when 'John' starts larruping the bejaysis out of the quiz machine in the boozer because he "can't read".

Shadwell Army.

I quite enjoy the weekly slot Jason Solomons does with Robert Elms.

The scene that elevated ID to film classic.

Some clever inventive type people have come up with an almost frictionless plastic which will revolutionise bottle manufacturing in the future.

I have seen (on TV) a demonstration using mayonnaise, where a bottle was turned upside down and within seconds, the dregs that were in the bottom had slid to the top. There was no mention of when we are likely to see these bottles in the shops though.

I am referring to the slide clip ones here my good man. And the solution to wind flappage issues is simply to venture outside with your suit jacket buttons done up.

Whilst logging on, I will reiterate what I have said before on this thread and say that fit and healthy grown men who wheel around small travel suitcases in a busy station concourse rather than pick the ****ers up and carry them are absolute *****.

I lost my patience with one fellow who was wheeling around something barely big enough to house a pair of speedos through a packed Kings Cross tube station concourse today, and gave the **** of a suitcase a crafty kick on my way past him. It was a momentary release of inner rage which immediately made me feel better.

Yes, don't wear it outside

Julian Assange,comes over as smug creepy and obnoxious

Pippa Middleton (who?) and the outrageous media love in and coverage of her wedding.

Agree. Couldn't give a toss

Ironically this coverage is for the benefit of those who will be doing exactly that.:D

It's the arse factor from the other wedding.

It is, however, very annoying.

Whilst she seems desperate to try to keep up with her sister with a faux royal wedding of her own, I mostly blame the media for over-estimating the public's level of interest in this.

I can understand why it would be covered by certain magazines, but it isn't worthy of the national news. We didn't have all this hoo-ha when Diana's sister got married, and her family were 'real' aristos.

imagine being one of the weirdos who care about this kind of thing. She's barely even a royal ffs, the no mark posho

Daily Mail have gone mad over it, couldn't give a toss.

I opened the CNN App on my phone this morning to see what was going on in the world at this was the top story... WTF!

That's bonkers ! Sky and the BBC here should be ashamed of themselves. Surely no one gives a damn.

Well, I tried to make out who was in the pictures but they were all obscured by her massive ego.

When I was looking at the BBC website newspaper review it had as much about Prince Harry's American girlfriend. Firstly like you lot I don't care about this wedding and secondly isn't there more important news.

Couldn't agree more!

So, the irrelevant piece of over-privileged fluff is getting married :moo2:

Famous only for wearing THAT bridesmaid dress, the vacuous waste of space and renowned author of informative tomes on partying, is marrying someone even richer than her family. Air Traffic Control should have been warned about all those noses in the air. Maybe she could write a book about the whole thing to rake in a bit more dosh. :rolleyes:

Is there anyone out there who actually cares? :moo: (Again)

Not when you have a PR budget the size of the Saxe-Coburgs.

Pippa Who? Still trying to get my head around Peppa the Pig

Hey come on...it's not easy organising a wedding that costs 318k !

She writes a list of what she wants, hands it to the events companies she's hired, they then give the bill to her dad whilst Little Miss Fluffy goes off to the beauty salon/spa.

By Christmas she'll have another book out, this time about planning a wedding.

Ant McPartlin. What a sham, talentless, play to the camera Bellend.

Sounds like you want someone to Dec him

Morris dancers.

Agreed. Beardy beer bums with no sense of rythm. I'll gather the posse.

Saw a drunken Morris dancer brawl one evening. It was beautiful, hilarious and surprisingly vicious.

Back in my University days, they used to have a folk dance weekend festival (they may still do) in York. Monday was normaly a slow news day for the York evening press but one banner on the news stands I remember following a festival was: "Morris dancers. Six arrests"

:hi: how many do we need for a posse? Can we start in E Sussex we are over run with them.

Bunch of heathen p!ssheads, the lot of 'em.

Power tool cases that don't have adequate room for the fecking power lead.

We've got three so far. You me and my mate who had his beer knocked over in a pub in Fletching and was told by one of these stick waving wally's that he should have been more careful where he put his pint. There then followed a robust exhchange which interrupted the second movement of their repertoire "wicked Sir Jasper's paso doble" or something similar. East Sussex you say? May only concern about stringing these arses up is that many of them are probably involved, off season, in Bonfire Society's an activity which I wholeheartedly approve of.