Nope. I've got more hair than that, and don't do 'sensible' shirts and hush puppies. :p

Olivia. There must be an Olivia. Or a Harry.

Funnily enough, this is the story of a middle class family who made poor investments/bad financial plans and ended up having to leave that house to move into the private rented sector, so essentially a poor choice of picture to go with my moan. However, they still look smug.....

The boy is either a Conrad or an Edward (but his parents call him 'Bear').

In English pubs not usually

'And what I could never have known is how soul-destroying it is to raise children in a house that is not your own.'


And:

'In our defence, we weren’t spending the money on expensive designer clothes, luxurious holidays or flash cars. Much of it was going on school fees and upkeep of the house.'

Twats.

Limescale

They should be priced individually, not by weight

Is that the name of one of the boys, or the girls?

:)

If I was going to have another one, I'd suggest Flavela.

Trumpton now having a new mayor. No Mexicans or Muslims in the town in the first place so no walls needing to be built between there and Chigley. But that slag with the dogs is in for a pasting get back in the kitchen, ugly bitch walking about willy nilly.

Idiots in the office who think their phone call is too important to interrupt to show some respect to our war dead for a couple of minutes a year.

******* wankers :veryangry

Some in our office think it's a good idea to read the Sun website whilst others are paying their respects.

Yeah but they'd all get a job at FIFA.

Point of order, l actually watched that episode and knew the track they played. It was actually a clever play on words, the song actually had sod all to do with "mould walls". It made me laugh.

Perhaps it grips you because it's clever?

Or I'm talking utter bollocks but like the track played.

Flo, 13, Annie, 11, Monty, nine, and two-year-old Dolly :afro:

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/ar...#ixzz4Pk2h2BVf
Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook

2012 according to DM

If that picture had been taken down here it would be. Taylah , Shawna, Storm and Fox. As for what the plebs would have called them I've no idea.

Woman at work.... she doesn't want to be there so bitches and moans for 8 hours, giving a running commentary of her feelings.

Talk about negative waves!

I'm not over the moon about being there myself, but she takes it to a new level, and bring me down with her.

I seem to so so much better days when she is out of the office, no matter what shit goes down.

i love stories like this. Not content with ruining their own lives through their own stupidity they decide to advertise it to the world.

Same with Come Dine With Me.
Occasionally, though the opposite is; "ooh, I like that tune - haven't heard it for years" then spending ages trying to remember it/find it again. Compounded by the clip being too short for Spotify.

I wonder if that delightful family in the Daily Mail photo have these problems, now that they have make do with just a 32" TV and the plebeian Entertainment Package on Sky to afford the dressage and Latin lessons for Hermione and Rufus.

Continual TV ads for Paul O'Grady's 'For The Love Of Dogs' - series 5 would you believe? Ads show various dogs constantly barking madly interspersed with O'Grady's obnoxious Brummie (or nearby) accent - can't stand the guy.
Feel sorry for the dogs that have to spend time around him - that's probably why they're whining & suicidal. Now he's started wearing really bad clothes in a desperate attempt to get noticed, a bit like Ade Edmondson on his UK travel show. They'd make a great couple. Please don't make series 6, there can't be that many dog lovers. If you own one, take it for a walk instead of forcing it to watch this pile of sh***! (OK, that's enough - Ed.)

When people bang their front teeth with a fork when eating. Its like chalk down a blackboard to me and it seems in any American TV series, they all do it.

The curry house taking an hour and a half to deliver my curry. Then they have forgot the Naan Bread.

SCUM SUCKERS

I had same problem once. Rang up and went fecking beserk and they were very apologetic and offered to drop it straight away to which I told them not to bother and that they had ruined my meal. Went back in to the living room and there it was sitting on the sofa next to where I had been sitting. :D

Thieving little shits in my shop this afternoon

Festival of Remembrance on Telly now. Abide With Me, probably one of the best and most moving hymns around, and they have some KwaZulu munter absolutely murdering it. Typical right on BBC. Pissed off, going to bed.

Were you tired and emotional ? :p

I trust you called them back to apologise :supergrin:

No I never used them again. The customer is always right.

More CCTV.

It won't stop the feckers but the police may have more evidence. If they're robbing you the c*nts will also be hitting other businesses.

Coffee served in glasses

Just **** off

There's a reason we have coffee cups you imbeciles

"That's wrong on so many levels"

Yes. Should always be qualified by details of exactly how many 'levels' of wrongness are involved, and what they are.

Car thefts in NCP's ?

"Taking it to the next level" is a variation that does my head in.
As does "sweating the assets".

You have probably just launched buzzword bingo, now.

Low hanging fruit.

Let's not try and boil the ocean guys

Are we all looking at the same dot on the wall ?

Shifting the paradigm

Air cover

Ooh can't wait for tomorrow so another week of that tripe can start

farting in a full lift ;)

Zips that get caught up in the material on the back especially when you are in a hurry and you just want to get your ******* coat off not be stuck in a claustrophobic straight jacket.

Charity shops with 'Donations never refused' signs in the window.
I went into Farah with a turd in a carrier bag. They said no. Lying bastards.

That happened to me yesterday. Except I was trying to put in on.

This happened to me when trying on jackets in a shop. I got the zip stuck right up near my chin and couldn't get it undone. I had to shuffle off to an assistant to ask for help, then stood there like a small child whilst she helped me out of the jacket. Not my finest hour

Lucky you weren't trying on trousers and the fly got stuck!

All the 'festive' adverts.
Go away all of you

"What do you think of the John Lewis Christmas advert?"
"Oh I prefer the Waitrose advert.."

Bore off

Things that annoy you
 

People in cycling clubs who insist on cycling next to each other blocking the road meaning it's hard to overtake when it would have been easy if they were in a single file.

"Wardrobe Malfunction"


**** off.

:cool: Yep stuck for 10 mins in E Sussex lanes behind two Lycra nazis two abreast probably discussing the test match.

Probably Dulwich Paragon.

Apparently it's fine to double up, but whether it's fair is in the eye of the car driver, or something.

"And so it begins"

Actors on film and tv who drink out of a cup that's obviously empty

Bad acting?

Come on bugs, get angry. Bore off?!! Who are you chatting to? Your mother in law? It's ******* shite!

My wife watching the incessant shite that is 'I'm a (thick as shit) Celebrity'.

I really thought that was just me that got so irate over that. It really winds me up, dunno why, but drives me mad!!!

He is very clearly a Scouser

Well not that clearly apparently :supergrin:

I'm not sure Lily Savage as a Brummie would have worked.

I suspect on the first take the cup was full(ish)... by the 16th take it is probably empty.

Also when someone is supposedly handed a freshly made cup of tea or coffee and they put their hands round the mug, which in real life would take the skin off their hands. Makes me want to go out murdering.

Far East Eagle on Paul O'Grady - 'He is very clearly a Scouser.'

Who cares where he's from? He's still a pain in the ass!

In more ways than one.

"Special relationship"

Ffs.

Gushing remembrance day tributes on Facebook - 'we will never forget them, their voices will never go unheard' blah blah blah.

As I see it the whole RD thing is a discreet, understated and touching tribute to those who did make amazing sacrifices but instead gets hijacked by the usual sorts for the worst kind of virtue signalling. Get £2, buy a poppy and pay your respects in the traditional and suitable manner instead of copying and pasting someone else's words into your FB to feed your endless narcissism.

describes FB nicely which is why i gave it up not long after i joined over 10 years ago. There seems to be a lot of insecure people out there.

People who post ridiculously simplistic solutions to complex World, economic and social issues, on Internet message boards and newspaper comments sections. Then sign off with 'job done' or 'simples'.

Sky Sports news at it again.

Countdown clock for Man U v Arsenal on Saturday :mad:

Accompanied with loads of clips from games gone by between the two teams so we can be whipped into a frenzy about what a big game it is. All it actually achieves is to remind us about what a big it used to be.

Exactly, they have gone mad this season turning it into American Wrestling type shit. Showing footage from 2001 ffs. If we stay up and Brighton somehow come up I expect the same thing. Focusing on the shit in the changing room and calling it 'Revenge of the turd' although we revenged that on the night and it won't be live on any poxy channel anyway. C*nts.

If it shows one thing it's the unbelievable passion shown by both sides, they really did give a feck about winning. The England v Scotland game tother night shows me the exact opposite.

Really? To me the only thing it shows is sky sports desire to drive armchair fans into a frothing gash over a 'big club' game to ramp up the advertising revenue and alleviate falling viewing figures.

International football has fallen by the way side and even most of the players don't seem to care.

Which is my point. About internationals anyhow.

Anyone who uses slang such as 'bare', or 'long'. Particularly when they are a middle class 'hipster' with a ridiculous beard, who's trousers have argued with their shoes, and have brightly coloured socks in the no-mans land.

Gardeners who leave the tags on their garden plants. Dunno why but I have an uncontrollable urge to rip them off - you should know their names anyway.

Hopefully it will be another 0-0 snoozefest and they will finally learn their lesson

In most areas of London now you're lucky to see a garden with any recognisable plants. Let alone anyone who could name them.

When I was over in May I was surprised by the parked car variety that most people had in their front gardens in Penge and Sydenham.

Was sat opposite 2 of these moany old ***** in my last job. Drains the life from you day after day, them constantly moaning and bitching about how shit the job and workplace is. Unfortunately they were too ******* thick and lazy to get a different job

Hearing Franz Ferdinand's version of Sound and Vision in the Co-op. Poor man's Stars in Their Eyes.

I watched the American election coverage,saw Kay Burley i dont remember ever taking such an instant dislike to anyone.What an annoying creature.Worst alleged journo ever.

Yes - this one has been their 42 years!

The Christmas Sainsbury's advert where the lyrics in the song say 'it's December now'.

NO IT C*NTING ISN'T.

Every f*cker involved with these pre pre December Christmas adverts should be rounded up Nazi style, taken to a field and slain. Failing that imprisoned for 4 months' hard labour with Christmas Day being solitary confinement with bread and water.

I saw a Christmas tree being put up outside Bromley Police Station today, ridiculous.

Coin has put up it's Chrimbo lights today....my 9 year old said that was silly.

Are you sure you're not just speaking to a chair?

Sarah Millican.

Comedien ? Really ?

About as funny as Palace's defence

Two things today, idiots that already have put up Christmas decorations.
02 priority, what a con, trying to get early tickets, only wanted 2 and yet surprise surprise none available. Half an hour wasted.

People that get annoyed by what other people do, that doesn't affect them. It's none of your ******* business.

Have you put your tree up too?

Yes, we have actually - the main reason being that my parents are away from December 10th-18th and we're away from December 16th-30th, so we're having meals and present exchanges with my family on various dates prior to that. As we're hosting, we want our house to look the part.

Not that us having a tree up in the privacy of our own home should be offensive to anyone else...

Absolutely, we're hosting so will a have a tree up but are then going to Norway on the 17th, they choose and cut their tree on Christmas eve (23rd)and then we all dance round it, fully clothed.

Men who use the male toilets at gyms/swimming pools/leisure centres as the changing room.

Skanky colleagues. The two at the other end of my bank of desks are surrounded by bags of rubbish, mouldy cups & that horrid blue paper companies use instead of tea towels. I have previously asked them if the mouldy cups were theirs, they looked blank so I binned them. The cups, not the skanky colleagues.

There is a spare desk between them & me. I think we are all glad of this.

People who call their partner by the sort of nickname you'd use on a football pitch e.g. surname Dobson becomes Dobs, Harmer becomes Harms.

That's just called being posh, innit?

That's right, Smithy.

The fact that the BBC have given Michael McIntyre another series

Apple becoming increasingly insistent that i upgrade my iOS. First it used to leave it to you with a little blue icon. Then it started doing a pop up that you could discard and it never reminded you again, then the pop up only gave you a choice of upgrade or remind me later so you had to do this every day. Now it has added yet another step to put in your passcode to trick you into upgrading or having to say remind me later again. I DONT WANT TO UPGRADE TO YOUR SHITTY NEW OS YOU MUPPETS!

I fail to understand why this bloke has had such a huge amount of airtime for all these years

Chihuahuas who bark at the moon. And crisp packets, leaves, and anything else that moves.

Ant and Dec. The law of averages suggests that one day they will say something funny but it's yet to happen.